Six Little Stories August 31, 2015
Posted by nrhatch in Humor, Life Balance, People, Word Play.comments closed
{1} Once all villagers decided to pray for rain.
On the day of prayer all the people gathered, but only one boy came with an umbrella.
That’s FAITH
{2} When you throw a baby in the air, she laughs because she knows you will catch her.
That’s TRUST
{3} Every night we go to bed, without any assurance of being alive the next morning but still we set the alarms to wake up.
That’s HOPE
(4) We plan big things for tomorrow in spite of zero knowledge of the future.
That’s CONFIDENCE
(5) We see the world suffering, but still we get married and have children.
That’s LOVE
{6} An old man’s shirt reads: “I am not 80 years old . . . I am sweet 16 with 64 years experience.”
That’s ATTITUDE
Aah . . . that’s better!
Source: E-mail from unknown author (sent by Joe M.)
Call The Paramedics! August 29, 2015
Posted by nrhatch in Humor, Joke.comments closed
Vinny and Sal are out in the woods hunting when suddenly Sal grabs his chest and falls to the ground.
He doesn’t seem to be breathing; his eyes are rolled back in his head.
Vinny whips out his cell phone and calls 911. He tells the operator, “I think Sal is dead! What should I do?”
The operator, in a calm soothing voice says, “Just take it easy and follow my instructions. First, let’s make sure he’s dead.”
There is a silence.
And then a gunshot is heard.
Vinny’s voice comes back on the line.
“Okay… Now what?”
Aah . . . that’s better!
Source: E-mail from unknown author (sent by Joe M.)
Centering Your Self August 27, 2015
Posted by nrhatch in Happiness, Less IS More, Meditation, Mindfulness.comments closed
From Lao Tzu:
The ego is a monkey catapulting through the jungle:
Totally fascinated by the realm of the senses,
it swings from one desire to the next,
one conflict to the next,
one self-centered idea to the next.
If you threaten it, it actually fears for its life.
Let this monkey go.
Let the senses go.
Let desires go.
Let conflicts go.
Let ideas go.
Let the fiction of life and death go.
Just remain in the center, watching.
And then forget that you are there.
Related: Quotes by Lao Tzo (Gaiam Life) * Hua Hu Ching: The Unknown Teachings of Lao Tzu
* * * * *
Artwork: Roderick MacIver Arts. The beauty of Rod’s art lies in his ability NOT to control all aspects of the water ~ he allows it latitude to do its thing while he paints. The result speaks for itself.
Spares & Splits @ Splitsville August 25, 2015
Posted by nrhatch in Food & Drink.comments closed
In June, we met BFF’s sister and her family at Splitsville in Downtown Disney.
We worked up an appetite throwing Strikes, Spares, and Splits (not necessarily in that order).
Famished, we refueled with pizza, salads, and fries in the adjoining dining room.
After lunch, we wandered in and out of shops searching for Mr. Potato Head accessories and LEGO kits . . . stopping by to see NESSIE!
The Loch Ness LEGO monster!
I have it on good authority that Nessie is a *SNAP* to make.
Aah . . . that’s better!
Odd & Even Parking August 22, 2015
Posted by nrhatch in Humor, Joke.comments closed
On a bitterly cold morning a husband and wife were listening to the radio during breakfast.
The announcer said, “We are going to have 8 to 10 inches of snow today. Park your car on the even-numbered side of the street, so snowplows can get through.”
The husband went out and moved his car.
A week later, the announcer said, “We’re expecting 10 to 12 inches of snow today. Park your car on the odd-numbered side of the street so snowplows can get through.”
The husband went out and moved his car again.
The next week they are again having breakfast when the radio announcer says, “We are expecting 12 to 14 inches of snow today. Park your car . . . ”
Then the electric power went out.
With a frown, the husband said, “I don’t know what to do. Which side of the street do I need to park on so the snowplows can get through?”
With the love, understanding, and patience that many married women possess, the wife replied, “Why don’t you just leave the car in the garage this time?”
Aah . . . that’s better!
Inspiration: e-mail from unknown author (sent by Granny1947)
“Men marry women with the hope that they will never change. Women marry men with the hope they will change. Invariably, they are both disappointed.” ~ Albert Einstein
Florida Scenes August 19, 2015
Posted by nrhatch in Art & Photography, Humor.comments closed
A crowded Palma Sola Causeway serves as control central for the annual Bottle Boat Regatta.
Boats float using recycled 2-liter plastic soda bottles as flotation devices. Unless they don’t, float.
Cows seldom enter. They’re not interested in rowing boats or “bragging rights.”
Downing grass and chewing cud from first light to last light consumes them. Makes sense . . .
Even if stomach #1 is stuffed to overflowing, they’ve got other tummies on “stand-by.”
Florida’s fields of green and grain alternate with miles and miles of shoreline.
Gator sightings are common along the banks. In fact, you can almost bank on it. (Less common are Crocs wearing Crocs.)
Hear rustling in the reeds? Get ready to *snap* that shot.
Idle Gators love to smile and say, “Let Go My Leg-o!”
Aah . . . that’s better!
Make Mine Kool-Aid August 17, 2015
Posted by nrhatch in Health & Wellness, Humor.comments closed
After a partial hysterectomy, my doctors recommended a colonoscopy.
I agreed and did all the nasty messy prep work.
YUCK!
Drinking the Drano (a/k/a Colon-Aid) made me throw up. Several times. It got me coming . . . and going.
In the morning, they put me under. Part way. Despite the anesthesia, I moaned and writhed in pain.
OUCH!
All for naught!
They couldn’t finish because their periscope wouldn’t go past the sigmoid.
When the anesthesia wore off, I had a headache the size of Montana. I could barely breathe.
But they weren’t done with me.
They sent me for a barium enema (which stopped up everything I had just cleaned out).
ACK!
It wasn’t fun. I will NEVER do it again.
And . . . I’m not alone:
Only one in six Americans over age 50 get the American Cancer Society’s recommended screening for colon cancer: a colonoscopy every 10 years, or a flexible sigmoidoscopy, virtual colonoscopy, or barium enema imaging every five years.
Surveys suggest that patients find the preparation – required for both colonoscopy and traditional virtual colonoscopy – to be the worst part of screening.
“A number of folks, who currently aren’t being screened because they fear the prep or aren’t willing to go through it again, may be willing to have screening if they’re told they don’t need to take laxatives and can still get a potent test,’’ said Dr. Durado Brooks, director of prostate and colon cancer for the American Cancer Society.
Good news!
There’s a new technique on the medical horizon which does not involve the dreaded laxative preparation to clear the colon:
The new technique works by using a contrast agent – a tiny amount of dye is ingested two days before the test – to highlight fecal matter in the colon, which can then be digitally erased from the scan using a software program, making it easier to see polyps.
In the study of 605 patients, published Monday in the Annals of Internal Medicine, the virtual colonoscopy was able to identify more than 90 percent of suspicious polyps that were 10 millimeters or larger, compared with 95 percent identified when the same patients later had a standard colonoscopy.
To read more: New Kind of Virtual Colonoscopy (Boston Globe)
If larger studies confirm the findings, the technique could serve as a first-line screening tool for colon cancer for people who avoid screening.
Like me!
And now for a laugh out loud moment . . .
Aah . . . that’s better!
The 7 Wonders Of The World August 15, 2015
Posted by nrhatch in Gratitude, Happiness, Mindfulness, Nature.comments closed
If asked to list the 7 wonders of the world, most people would include at least a few of the following:
1. Great Pyramids
2. Taj Mahal
3. Grand Canyon
4. Panama Canal
5. Empire State Building
6. Great Wall of China
7. St. Peter’s Basilica
On further reflection, perhaps we might revise the list to include:
1. Seeing
2. Hearing
3. Tasting
4. Touching
5. Smelling
6. Laughing
7. Loving
Aah . . . that’s better!
Source: E-mail from unknown author (sent by Joe M.)
MASHterFULL MASHterPIECES! August 13, 2015
Posted by nrhatch in Art & Photography, Food & Drink.comments closed
Art Center Sarasota invited us to MASHterPIECES ~ an event co-sponsored by Goodwill. Participating artists upcycled art purchased from Goodwill, putting their own spin on it.
Other galleries displayed original pieces in all manner of mediums.
Having a glass of wine or other adult beverage in hand enhances the Art Viewing experience for us.
As does nibbling on nibbles.
At MASHterPIECES, the caterer set up a MASHterFUL Mashed Potato Bar.
With all the fixings!
We soaked up some delightful art with a side of smashed tatties.
With all the fixings!
Aah . . . that’s better!
How do you like your potatoes? In the jacket . . . or out?
Salads, Spoonbills, & Sunset Scenes August 11, 2015
Posted by nrhatch in Food & Drink, Humor.comments closed
For our 31st Anniversary, we went to Village Idiot Pizzeria. A sign on the door said, “Closed. On vacation for the month of June.”
They are NO idiots!
We came up with Plan B . . . dinner at the Bridge Tender Inn on Bridge Street.
Only the salads (and our waitress) turned out to be vegetarian friendly.
While waiting for our salads to arrive, we watched the locals.
As they spooned up muddy waters.
For a soothing sushi dinner.
While watching out for ankle biters!
After dinner, we walked down the beach to check out the groin project.
Looking it over . . . up and down . . . top to bottom.
We walked back to Bridge Street and watched the sun set.
Enjoying coastal colors and cheerful company.
Before retrieving the car, we turned around for a final peek.
Aah . . . that’s better!
Spirit Lights The Way 