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Hop On The Bus, Gus! December 1, 2015

Posted by nrhatch in Art & Photography, Happiness, Humor, People.
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J.K. Rowling gave a commencement speech at Harvard one year.

In that speech she said, “You will never truly know yourself or the strength of your relationships until both have been tested by adversity.”

I agree with her . . . and with Oprah.

“Everyone wants to ride with you in the limo, but what you want is someone who will take the bus with you when the limo breaks down.” ~ Oprah Winfrey


Aah . . . that’s better!

Island Trolley by Barbara Hines ~ Anna Maria Island Art

Just Take Two November 28, 2015

Posted by nrhatch in Humor, Joke, People.

Woodstock-&-Snoopy3Brenda and Steve took their six-year-old son to the doctor.

With some hesitation, they explained that although their little angel appeared to be in good health, they were concerned about his rather small penis.

After examining the child, the doctor confidently declared, “Just feed him pancakes. That should solve the problem.”

220px--Lena_Horne_conserves_fuel_(gas).-,_ca._1941_-_ca._1945_-_NARA_-_535820The next morning when the boy arrived at breakfast, there was a large stack of warm pancakes in the middle of the table.

“Gee, Mom,” he exclaimed, “for me?”

“Just take two,” Brenda replied. “The rest are for your father.”

Aah . . . that’s better!

Source:  E-mail from unknown author (sent by Joe M.)

The Flying Monkey November 19, 2015

Posted by nrhatch in Happiness, Life Balance, Mindfulness, People.

2014-11-17 12-05-45_0022Once upon a place and time, a monkey flew through the jungle, clinging and swinging from vine to vine.

Ignorant of his true nature, he clung to the belief that he could fly only when swinging and clinging from one vine to the next.

He swung as he clung and clung as he swung.

Afraid to “let go.”

Until the day he woke up and remembered who he was.

No longer attached to the vines and entwined beliefs that had held him back, he found his wings and soared.

FlyLike a flying monkey, the Mind swings from thought to thought until we wake up and “let go.”

No longer attached to stories about the past or future fears, we fly through the Eternal Now.

And live happily ever after on a moment by moment basis.

Aah . . . that’s better!

A Test of the Emergency Humor Network November 3, 2015

Posted by nrhatch in Happiness, Humor, Life Balance, People.

Test.  This is a test of the Emergency Humor Network.

 * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *


Say something funny. 


My sense of humor is MIA.

 * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *


This was only a test of the Emergency Humor Network.

If this had been an actual Emergency, you would have heard me howling and yowling through cyber space.

Again.  This was only a test.  

We now return you to your regularly scheduled programming.

Grumpy gus

Aah . . . that’s better!

Related:  5 Reasons to Stop Ignoring Negative Emotions (Think Simple Now)

A Baker’s Dozen October 27, 2015

Posted by nrhatch in Happiness, Humor, Life Balance, People.

Grumpy gus1. We each have the same number of choices to make each moment of each waking hour:  What to think about NOW . . . and NOW . . . and NOW . . . and NOW.

2.  If we think grateful, kind, compassionate thoughts, we are happier than when we think about all the reasons why we are disgruntled with the current state of affairs.  Don’t rush to take offense.

3.  There is no Universal Mandate for all.  We each need to be guided from within based on our values, our experiences, and our truths (which may change over time).

4. Embrace the present moment.  Release your grip on the past.  Keep moving forward. No thing’s meant to last.


5.  Attempting to satisfy Ego is futile ~ Ego is a mask; it can never be satisfied.  With no Ego, we ride the crest of the now . . . with bliss as our constant companion.  We desire only what we already possess.  Here.  Now.  Just Be.

6.  The BEST thing about not working ~> MORE time to do LESS.

7.  I limit my shopping frustration by limiting my shopping and NEVER going when I’m in a rush. Most weeks we shop only for groceries.  And cat treats.

8.  I’m OK with the idea that I am not going to change the world. Instead I try to make a difference in the lives of people I see every day.

9.  The pope’s decision to label someone a “saint” (or a “sinner”) has no impact on how I view the world ~> his decision is irrelevant since I can’t imagine using the Roman Catholic Church or its edicts as a yardstick for my life.

10.   If IT makes me feel GOOD now, IT is good for me NOW. This yardstick helps me enjoy things in moderation . . . because too much of any IT makes me feel bad NOW.

black-cat11.  Reading a cat’s mind is easy.  All you need is a Magic 8 Ball, Tarot cards, tea leaves, or a pair of dice.

It’s a crap shoot since cats are FICKLE.  And they use the same barometer I do: “If IT makes me feel GOOD now, IT is good for me NOW.”

12.  You can only reason with reason-able people.  Ego is not reason-able.  Neither is your cat.

13.  Quotes are like post-its for the mind ~ they help us remember the lessons we’ve learned.

Aah . . . that’s better!

Compounding & Confounding Interest October 24, 2015

Posted by nrhatch in Humor, Joke, Less IS More, People.

Groom-&-Bride-catsOn their wedding night, a bride asked her husband for $20 for their first lovemaking encounter.

He agreed.

This scenario was repeated each time they made love, for more than 40 years ~ he viewed it as a cute way for her to afford new clothes and shoes.

You know, more STUFF!


Arriving home at noon one day, the wife found her husband falling off the couch drunk.

“I’ve been let go. Corporate downsizing. Those bastards! I’m 64. I’ll never find a position that pays anywhere near what I’ve been earning.  We’re ruined!”

His wife smiled and handed him a bank book with forty years of steady deposits and interest.

250px-New_Orleans_City_of_Old_Romance_and_New_Opportunity_Crop_p_23_MoneybagsThe account totaled nearly $1 million.

Shocked, her husband stared at the total and then said:

“If I’d had any idea what you were doing, I would have given you ALL my business!”

That’s when she gave him the business!

Aah . . . that’s better!

Source:  e-mail from unknown author (sent by Joe M.) 

You know, some men just don’t know when to keep their mouths shut.

Less IS more.

The Best Way to Get a Trophy Wife October 3, 2015

Posted by nrhatch in Humor, Joke, People.

Betty-BoopBob, an extremely wealthy 70-year-old widower, shows up at the Country Club with a breathtakingly beautiful and very sexy 25-year-old woman who knocks everyone’s socks off with her youthful sex appeal and charm as she hangs on Bob’s arm and listens intently to his every word.

His buddies at the club are in awe.

At the first chance, they corner him and ask, “Bob, how’d you get the trophy girlfriend?”


Bob replies, “Girlfriend? She’s my wife!”

“Wow!  How’d you persuade her to marry you?”

“Easy!  I lied about my age.”

“What, did you tell her you were only 50?”

Bob smiles and says, “No, I told her I was 90.”

Aah . . . that’s better!

Source:  E-mail from unknown author (sent by Joe M.)

Speak Up . . . Or Shut Up? September 16, 2015

Posted by nrhatch in People.

I got “shushed” this week.


For talking about how angry I am that the U.S. Government spies on “we, the people” ~ taping our phone calls, texts, e-mails, etc.

IMHO: Stealing our words, thoughts, and ideas and storing them for later use is devious, disingenuous, and . . . a disgraceful shame.

I expect more from a country self-identified as “the land of the free and the home of the brave.”

TimonBut it appears that digital “search and seizure” of private communications is not on the “approved discussion” list.

As soon as I brought the topic up, the shusher admonished me to cease and desist:



Donald-DuckaI decided to stop talking . . . why waste my breath? :/

But it bothers me that ANYONE would equate the erosion of civil liberties and increasing government intrusion as “politics” and, therefore, not open for public debate.

I think we’re doomed! :roll:

Aah . . . that’s better!

To learn more ~> CITIZENFOUR

Reality: Facebook September 12, 2015

Posted by nrhatch in Humor, Joke, People.

7dwarfsFacebook allows us to share our lives with strangers while making new friends.  As an experiment, I am trying to make friends outside of Facebook by applying the same basic principles:

Every day I walk down the street and tell passers-by what I ate for breakfast, how I feel, what I did the night before and what I plan to do tomorrow night.

grumpy_thinkingThen I show them pictures of my family, my dog, and me gardening and spending time in my pool.

I also listen to them and I tell them I’m laughing out loud. (Even if I’m not.)

It works!

I already have 3 people following me: a cop, a shrink, and a lawyer who says I’m eligible for social security disability due to “mental instability.”

Aah . . . that’s better!

Source:  e-mail from unknown author (sent by Joe M.) 

Long Live The Queen! September 9, 2015

Posted by nrhatch in People.

Queen Elizabeth II has now reigned longer than any other British Monarch . . . passing the previous record held by her great-great-grandmother Queen Victoria.

The Queen succeeds Victoria as the United Kingdom’s longest-reigning monarch after 63 years and 218 days on the throne.

During that time, she has worked with a dozen British Prime Ministers and a dozen U.S. Presidents.

Long Live The Queen!

To read more:

Elizabeth & Victoria in Numbers (BBC)

33 Fun Facts and Photos as Elizabeth overtakes Victoria (The Telegraph)

Queen Elizabeth to Break Victoria’s Record (Toronto Star)


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