13 Pieces of Potpourri

Lists organize our thoughts and lives.  Instead of jetsam, gossamer, and detritus floating about us in the ether, we gather our thoughts together and wrap them up with a tidy little bow:

* 5 Ways to Clear Clutter
* 25 Ways to Enjoy Life
* 125 Things I Like to Eat
* 625 of my MOST Favorite Things
* 3,125 Ways to Recycle Wine Corks

But what about our more unique observations?  The ones that don’t run with the pack, or fit in with a clique?

What about those thoughts which lack the necessary commonality with other astute commentary?

We can still gather them together in a bow-tied list . . . of  Potpourri!

1.  At weddings and other formal functions, why do women  shiver in sheer wisps of nothingness (displaying bare shoulders, arms, and backs) while men waddle about in warmth, swaddled like penguins in tux, tails, and ties?

And, as a host, how do you decide on an appropriate thermostat setting?  

Hmm . . . Antarctic Chill or Tropical Breeze?

2.  You know you are a true domestic goddess when you push away the advances of a sexy boy toy  to speak with the grocer about bok choy:

George Clooney, Mutton Tikka, and Jenny Morris

3.  Last night, as we watched Carly Simon sing aboard the RMS Queen Mary 2, I noticed and noted that her mouth is quite generous in proportion to the rest of her face.

A trait she shares with other notables: Mary Tyler Moore, Julia Roberts, Hilary Swank, and (according to BFF) . . .  Mister Ed!

Wilbur!

A horse is a horse, of course, of course, and no one can talk to a horse, of course, unless, of course, that talking horse is the famous Mr. Ed!

4.  A name is nothing more than a label we use to distinguish one person from the next.  Still, I’m glad that my name did not come attached to the initials:  VD, SOB, MF or BM.

My heart-felt condolences go out to Vicky Dougherty, Sean O’Brien, Mary Fine, and Barney Miller

5.  The other night, while brushing my teeth, I delighted in the simple fact that my birth occurred AFTER the advent of the toothbrush.

A similar thought crossed my mind as I reached for the toilet paper.

And, now, a confession:  the rest of this list is . . .

6.  Lost in Space
7.  “Absent.”
8.  MIA (missing in action).
9.  Escaped into the ether.
10.  Misfired synapse.
11.  Senior moment.
12.  Under Construction.

13.  Perhaps, instead of calling this stage of life the Twilight Years, they should warn us that we are about to  enter The Twilight Zone!

I know, I know . . . calling this list 13 Pieces of Potpourri is closer to science-fiction than fact.

In an effort to redeem myself, and resurrect my reputation (before it becomes permanently tarnished), here’s A Short List of Other Lists You Might Enjoy:

* 88 Important Truths I’ve Learned About Life

* 40 Belief-Shaking Remarks From A Ruthless Nonconformist

In the interest of complete candor and/or full disclosure, please feel free to  refer to this post as 88 Important Truths, 40 Belief-Shaking Remarks, and 5 or 6 Pieces of Potpourri.