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Unicorn Noodles August 29, 2018

Posted by nrhatch in Food & Drink, Humor, Vegetarian Recipes.
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Since I’m in hypo-drive for the summer, today’s one and only SLTW post is over at TG’s place, but I’ll warn you . . . TG thinks it looks more like a one-horned goat than a unicorn.

I think he also called me lazy.

Chasing Unicorns

Our unicorn today comes from nrhatch, at https://nrhatch.wordpress.com/. Herblog seems to be about self-help and humor. So if you need help (and don’t we all), or you need a good laugh, click on over and check it out.

I’m not sure if this thing shebeamed me is really a unicorn. It looks suspiciously like a one-horned goat. It consists of a short, explanatory blurb, followed by a link. Boy you talk about lazy. But that’s just it, I’m not one to talk.

So I’ll go ahead and give it a shot. This time. If it works out okay, then fine. Otherwise I’mgonna have to raise my unicorn-identifying standards.

Go ahead and give it a read (won’t take long), and decide for yourself. Is this a unicorn, or have I lost my noodle?


Scientists have discovered why spaghetti noodles don’t break cleanly in two pieces.

And…

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John McCain’s Farewell August 27, 2018

Posted by nrhatch in Gratitude, People.
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“My fellow Americans, whom I have gratefully served for sixty years, and especially my fellow Arizonans,

“Thank you for the privilege of serving you and for the rewarding life that service in uniform and in public office has allowed me to lead. I have tried to serve our country honorably. I have made mistakes, but I hope my love for America will be weighed favorably against them.

“I have often observed that I am the luckiest person on earth. I feel that way even now as I prepare for the end of my life. I have loved my life, all of it. I have had experiences, adventures and friendships enough for ten satisfying lives, and I am so thankful. Like most people, I have regrets. But I would not trade a day of my life, in good or bad times, for the best day of anyone else’s.

“I owe that satisfaction to the love of my family. No man ever had a more loving wife or children he was prouder of than I am of mine. And I owe it to America. To be connected to America’s causes – liberty, equal justice, respect for the dignity of all people – brings happiness more sublime than life’s fleeting pleasures. Our identities and sense of worth are not circumscribed but enlarged by serving good causes bigger than ourselves.

“‘Fellow Americans’ – that association has meant more to me than any other. I lived and died a proud American. We are citizens of the world’s greatest republic, a nation of ideals, not blood and soil. We are blessed and are a blessing to humanity when we uphold and advance those ideals at home and in the world. We have helped liberate more people from tyranny and poverty than ever before in history. We have acquired great wealth and power in the process.

“We weaken our greatness when we confuse our patriotism with tribal rivalries that have sown resentment and hatred and violence in all the corners of the globe. We weaken it when we hide behind walls, rather than tear them down, when we doubt the power of our ideals, rather than trust them to be the great force for change they have always been.

“We are three-hundred-and-twenty-five million opinionated, vociferous individuals. We argue and compete and sometimes even vilify each other in our raucous public debates. But we have always had so much more in common with each other than in disagreement. If only we remember that and give each other the benefit of the presumption that we all love our country we will get through these challenging times. We will come through them stronger than before. We always do.

“Ten years ago, I had the privilege to concede defeat in the election for president. I want to end my farewell to you with the heartfelt faith in Americans that I felt so powerfully that evening.

I feel it powerfully still.

“Do not despair of our present difficulties but believe always in the promise and greatness of America, because nothing is inevitable here. Americans never quit. We never surrender. We never hide from history. We make history.

“Farewell, fellow Americans. God bless you, and God bless America.”

Aah . . . that’s better!

But I Don’t Wanna Be Homemade! August 25, 2018

Posted by nrhatch in Humor, Joke.
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Six year old Annie returns home from school and says she had her first family planning lesson at school.

Her mother, very interested, asks: “Oh… How did it go?”

“I nearly died of shame!” she answers. “Sam from down the street says the stork brings babies. Sally next door said you get babies at the orphanage. Pete says you can buy babies at the hospital.”

Her mother smiles, “But that’s no reason to be ashamed.”

“Yes it is!  How can I tell them that we were so poor that you and daddy had to make me yourselves!”

Aah . . . that’s better!

Source:  E-mail from unknown author (sent by Joe M.)

Cutting Through The Headlines August 23, 2018

Posted by nrhatch in Food & Drink, Health & Wellness.
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“[W]hen you cut through the headlines, marketing campaigns and studies, Katz* says, you’ll find that most experts agree on a few fundamentals of nutrition: vegetables, fruits, whole grains, beans, lentils, nuts, seeds and plain water should make up the majority of what people eat and drink.”

“If there is such a thing as a “best” diet, he says, that’s it.”

“The fact that whole foods, close to nature, mostly plants, are good for people: that never changes,” says Katz. “It’s the fundamental truth we’re not willing to accept.”

To Read More:  There’s No Such Thing as a Single “Best” Diet (Time)

Aah . . . that’s better!

*Dr. David Katz, founding director of Yale University’s Yale-Griffin Prevention Research Center

Wanted: Optimists August 21, 2018

Posted by nrhatch in Gratitude, Happiness.
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C’mon, get happy!

Stop focusing on the 24/7 doom & gloom news feed and savor something fun:

There’s one problem with the pessimist’s perspective: it’s wrong.

That negative dystopian soup is an illusion, the result of an unfortunate collision between a 24/7 news cycle and the brain’s tendency to hone in on any possible danger and ignore everything else.

Overall, things on planet Earth are pretty good — or at least, in many ways, they’ve never been better. No country in the world has a lower life expectancy now than the countries with the highest life expectancies in 1800. More people around the world believe in gender equality than ever before, and more value religious freedom. Poverty, malnutrition, illiteracy, child labor and infant mortality are all on the decline.

Humanity has made enormous progress by almost every measure, but that progress has become the water in which we swim, and like fish, we take the water for granted. We focus on the beasts that are still out there in the deep rather than on those we have tamed because that’s what we’re designed to do.

As neuropsychologist Rick Hanson described in his 2013 book Hardwired for Happiness, our brains naturally put greater emphasis on the negative. “Just a handful of painful experiences of futility can rapidly become a sense of helplessness,” he writes, while “most good news has little or no effect on lasting memory systems in the brain.”

In other words, it’s natural to let the bad news overwhelm us. Fortunately, with practice, we can help our brains to give the good stuff equal weight. Dr. Hanson’s advice: when you hear a great story, achieve something in your own life or just find yourself in a beautiful place with those you love, deliberately rest your mind on that experience and stay with it.

Sink into that feeling, he writes, “as it sinks into you.” Describe what you’re doing to your kids, and encourage then to dwell on their joys and pleasures as well.

To read more:  How to Raise Optimistic Kids in Pessimistic Times (Times)

Aah . . . that’s better!

Government Contacts & Contracts August 18, 2018

Posted by nrhatch in Humor, Joke.
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Three contractors are bidding to fix a broken fence at the White House.

One is from Chicago, another is from Kentucky, and the third is from New Orleans. All three go with a White House official to examine the fence.

The New Orleans contractor takes out a tape measure and does some measuring, then works some figures with a pencil.  “Well,” he says, “I figure the job will run about $9,000. That’s $4,000 for materials, $4,000 for my crew and $1,000 profit for me.”

The Kentucky contractor also does some measuring and figuring, then says, “I can do this job for $7,000. That’s $3,000 for materials, $3,000 for my crew and $1,000 profit for me.”

The Chicago contractor doesn’t measure or figure, but leans over to the White House official and whispers, “$27,000.”

The official, incredulous, says, “You didn’t even measure! How did you come up with such a high figure?”

“The Chicago contractor whispers back, “$10,000 for me, $10,000 for you, and we hire the guy from Kentucky to fix the fence.”

“Done!” replies the government official.

And that, my friends, is how the Government operates.

It ain’t just fences that are broken in D.C.!

Aah . . . that’s better!

Source:  E-mail from unknown author (sent by Joe M.)

What’s Next? August 13, 2018

Posted by nrhatch in Happiness, Humor, Life Balance, Meditation, Mindfulness.
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Peace in knowing . . . and in not knowing

Always prepared . . . to be unprepared

Reveling in the mystery
Surrounded by uncertainty
In a vast field of possibility

What’s next?

Who knows?

Aah . . . that’s better!

Providing Perspective August 11, 2018

Posted by nrhatch in Gratitude, Happiness, Life Balance, Mindfulness.
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Life is not half bad.

Yes, I know that POTUS + Power are NOT perfect together.

And I know that wildfires are raging out of control, earthquakes are shaking things up in Indonesia, and global warming is wreaking havoc on the ice caps and glaciers (unless, of course, you are convinced that that’s all Fake News in which case God Bless You).

But I still say that “Life is not half bad.”

Why?

Because of what I just learned about the Black Plague.

A few facts (that may or may not be entirely accurate, but could be) excerpted from Philip Ziegler’s classic account of the Black Death, aptly entitled The Black Death . . . (as recounted by Bill Bryson in his humorous travelogue, aptly entitled Neither Here Nor There ~ Travels in Europe):

*Half the population of Florence Italy (roughly 100,000) lost their lives in just 4 months.

To put that in perspective, think about waking up 4 months from now (on New Years Day, say) to find one half of your street, neighborhood, town, or city dead.  As a doornail.  Like Marley of A Christmas Carol fame.

Not an auspicious start to the New Year, eh?

*Milan reacted to the news swiftly ~> families suspected of harboring a plague victim were walled up inside their homes.  Definitely a solution designed to add to the death toll.

As Bill Bryson put it:

“There’s nothing like reading about people being entombed alive to put your own problems in perspective.  I tend to think of life as bleak when I can’t find a parking space at the supermarket, but imagine what it must have been to be an Italian in the fourteenth century.  For a start, in 1345 it rained nonstop for six months, turning much of the country into a stagnant lake and making planting impossible.  The economy collapsed, banks went bust, and thousands died in the ensuing famines.  Two years later the country was rocked with terrible earthquakes ~ in Rome, Naples, Pisa, Padua, and Venice ~ which brought more death and chaos.  And then, just when people were surely thinking that things had to get better now, some anonymous sailor stepped ashore at Genoa and said, “You know, I don’t feel so hot,” and within days the great plague was beginning its long sweep across Europe.” (p.181-82)

Perspective is everything.

We are HERE and it is NOW.

Aah . . . that’s better!

Health Alert from Fox News August 11, 2018

Posted by nrhatch in Humor, Joke.
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Health Alert for Men

If you are taking Viagra, make sure the label says “Made in USA”.

We do not want the Russians meddling in our erections.

Aah . . . that’s better!

Source:  E-mail from unknown author (sent by Joe M.)

For a related read:  Why Amerika is Great Again (Chasing Unicorns)

 

I’m Not Kidding Around August 4, 2018

Posted by nrhatch in Animals, Home & Garden, Humor.
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A Boise Idaho neighborhood woke up to an unusual sight this week ~> a herd of 100+ goats providing “free lawn service” (while eating everything in sight).

The herd owned by “We Rent Goats” escaped from their nearby grazing station and decided to give the neighborhood’s nice green lawns a trim.

I’m NOT kidding around.  

A roving band of rent-a-goats did invade a Boise Idaho suburb this week.  

Once they finished breakfast, the lawns probably looked like this . . .  

Shortly after breakfast, “We Rent Goats” came by to reclaim the goats.

BAA-h . . . that’s better!