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Learning To Cuss December 9, 2017

Posted by nrhatch in Food & Drink, Humor, Joke.
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 A 6-year-old and a 4-year-old are raking the yard.

Ryan, the 6-year-old, says, “You know what? I think it’s about time we started learning to cuss.  What do you think?”

Timothy, the 4-year-old, nods his head in approval.

Ryan continues, “When we go in for breakfast, I’m gonna say something with hell and you say something with ass.”

Timothy agrees with enthusiasm.

When their mother walks into the kitchen and asks Ryan what he wants for breakfast, he replies, “Aw, hell, Mom, I guess I’ll have some Cheerios.”

WHACK!

He flies out of his chair, tumbles across the kitchen floor, gets up, and runs upstairs to his room with his mother in hot pursuit.

His mom shuts Ryan in his room and says, “You can stay there until I say you can come out!”

She returns to the kitchen, looks at Timothy, and asks with a stern voice, “And what do YOU want for breakfast, young man?”

“I don’t know,” Timothy blubbers, “but you can bet your ass it won’t be Cheerios.”

Aah . . . that’s better!

Source:  E-mail from unknown author (sent by Joe M.)

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Comments»

1. Jill Weatherholt - December 9, 2017

I loved this, Nancy! Happy Saturday!

nrhatch - December 9, 2017

Happy Saturday, Jill! We’re having cold wet weather today, but have a cocktail party to attend tonight.

Oh! Maybe the hostess will be serving some delicious CHEESE!

Jill Weatherholt - December 9, 2017

LOL! As soon as you mentioned a cocktail party, I thought of cheese! 🙂 We’re cold and wet, too.

nrhatch - December 9, 2017

Someone brought a dish with mascarpone cheese, fig preserves, and Marconi almonds. So good!

But we needed a “midnight snack” after we got home ~ grilled cheese! 😀

2. Tippy Gnu - December 9, 2017

😀

nrhatch - December 9, 2017

Were you a big brother? A little brother? Or a solo?

Tippy Gnu - December 9, 2017

My parents were married many times, so I have brothers all over the place. I just consider every human male to be my brother.

nrhatch - December 9, 2017

That’s very inclusive of you!

3. Kate Crimmins - December 9, 2017

Awww kids! So sweet and innocent until we ruin them!

nrhatch - December 9, 2017

Yup! I get such a kick out of kids before they learn to filter their thoughts. 😀

4. Val Boyko - December 9, 2017

Good one Nancy 😂

nrhatch - December 9, 2017

Next Saturday’s post is even better!

Val Boyko - December 10, 2017

The mind boggles … 😳

nrhatch - December 10, 2017

Instead of “kids say the darnedest things” it’s more along the lines of “seniors say it like it is.” 😀

5. Joanne - December 9, 2017

Ahhh ha ha ha…!!! I sure needed the laugh today… Thanks, Nancy…!

Also, this reminds me of how I always say that I had to learn CSL (Cussing as a Second Language) to be understood by my youngest ones dad (rest his smart ass).

When baby Olivia was starting to talk, to my own embarrassment, one of her first words was the “F” bomb. However, although her dad would laugh over it privately, if she had attitude or answered him back, he got the notion to start putting hot sauce on her tongue.

After several unwanted treatments of hot sauce, when Olivia got mouthy one day, her dad threatened, “Hey…! Do you want some hot sauce…?”

She comes back unexpectedly with a happy grin and says, “Hot sauce…?” Then it was my turn to laugh hysterically.

nrhatch - December 10, 2017

My mother once washed my mouth out with soap ~> YUCK! I did NOT acquire a taste for it! 😦

Joanne - December 10, 2017

😳😱🤪

6. L. Marie - December 10, 2017

Ha ha! That reminds me of when I was a kid trying to cuss like other kids. 😀 😃 😄

nrhatch - December 10, 2017

We learn through trial and . . . ERROR! 😀

7. joyroses13 - December 10, 2017

Laughter before bed! 🙂

nrhatch - December 11, 2017

Laughter = a great note to retire on!

8. Tiny - December 12, 2017

Laughing! “My” 3-year old says and does everything the 7-year old does…just waiting for this scene 😀

nrhatch - December 13, 2017

Parents have to stifle the laughter long enough to nip bad habits in the bud. 😀

9. Joanne Sisco - December 13, 2017

LOL!! What a great way to start a very chilly morning – with a good belly laugh. Seems like little Timothy’s deductive reasoning needs some tweaking 🤣

nrhatch - December 13, 2017

He’ll no doubt have a life long aversion to Cheerios!

Joanne Sisco - December 13, 2017

… and for good reason 😉


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