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Elementary, My Dear Watson! October 15, 2016

Posted by nrhatch in Books & Movies, Humor, People.
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Who’s the first literary character that springs to mind when you think Aquatics Safety?

Homer-Mexican

Dr. Jekyll / Mr. Hyde?
The Green Hornet?
Homer Simpson?
Tarzan?
Robinson Crusoe?

Hold that thought.

The other day we arrived at the beach for our walk and noticed a red and white striped pavilion-style tent on the beach, with a film crew bustling about.

We walked over to find out what they were filming and to ascertain whether they had all the necessary permits to film on the beach.

Not that I know which permits are necessary, but it never hurts to expand one’s base of knowledge.

Donald-DirectorThe director yelled, “CUT!”

Time for action.

I wandered over to ask what he was filming.

“Hi.  What are you filming?”

“A training video.”

My litigation background kicked in and stood me in good stead as I countered his rather terse response with a question designed to elicit additional scintillating details.

“What kind of training video?”

“Aquatics Safety.”

Deciding to expand my base of knowledge elsewhere, I scanned past the hustle and bustle of the film crew and noticed two actors sitting on the sidelines studying their lines.

Of course, at that distance, I couldn’t be certain they were looking over the script.  It could have been a Take Out Menu for lunch, but I suspected script.

Their distinctive dress was a dead giveaway.  In less time than it takes to flip off my flip flops, I deduced they’d been cast as the first literary duo that springs to mind whenever one considers the topic of Aquatics Safety . . .

Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson!

What’s that?  You don’t see the glaringly obvious tie-in between Holmes, Watson, and Aquatics Safety?

Too bad.  I had hoped you could clue me in.

Anyway, BFF and I watched a take or two and then I got a chance to talk to Sherlock during a break in filming.

“Sherlock, you lucky dog!”

“Pardon?”

“I see you are garbed in a wool cloak, a woolen vest, wool trousers, and a deerstalker cap.”

“Quite right.”

“You will, of course, agree that that gabardine garb would be quite unbearable and, indeed, vastly uncomfortable, if the temperature here on the beach hovered in the mid- to upper-90’s . . . as it has for at least 98 of the past 100 days.”

“Agreed.”

“And I suspect you will also concur that, given the sudden recent shift in weather from the standard seasonal summer setting of “BLAZING HOT” to autumn’s vastly more reasonable”FUN IN THE SUN,” your gabardine get-up will NOT cause your get up and go to get up and go before the director’s done filming.”

“Quite so.”

“If you will permit me, I will go so far as to venture one further observation.  And that is this:  In light of the gorgeous cooling breeze blowing inland from the Gulf, you, despite your attire, will NOT perspire or expire from extreme heat exhaustion, no matter how many takes the director takes.”

“Indeed.”

“Ergo. Ipso. Facto.  E Pluribus Unum.  Quid Pro Quo.  Res Ipsa Loquitar.”

“Yes!  Yes!  Exactly right.  I see the reasoning of your logic and the logic of your reasoning.”

“I thought you might.”

“I am, indeed, one lucky dog.”

“Now, tell me old chap.  Just what do you and Watson have to do with Aquatics Safety?”

“Haven’t the foggiest.”

Aah . . . that’s better!

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Comments»

1. Val Boyko - October 15, 2016

I’m clueless too! A fascinating conundrum my dear Nancy!

nrhatch - October 15, 2016

Perhaps it has to do with the Hound of the Baskervilles learning to do the doggy paddle?

Val Boyko - October 15, 2016

Perfect!

2. Jill Weatherholt - October 15, 2016

I’m with Val…totally clueless! Happy Saturday!

nrhatch - October 15, 2016

Happy Saturday to you too! We’re off to the Farmer’s Market to meet up with a completely different cast of characters.

3. Tippy Gnu - October 15, 2016

It’s elementary. They were investigating a drowning.

nrhatch - October 15, 2016

By George, he’s got it! Well done, old chap.

4. granny1947 - October 15, 2016

The mind boggles. Hope you let us know if the documentary comes out(which sounds doubtful)

nrhatch - October 15, 2016

Spot on. Given the small size of the crew hustling and bustling about, I’m going to surmise that this low-budget training video is not going to be released for the big screen ~ it’s probably for local school children.

5. Kate Crimmins - October 15, 2016

The director was fibbing?

nrhatch - October 15, 2016

What?! You believe him to be a fibber? A fabricator? A fabulist? A prevaricator? A storyteller?

Aah, yes. Storytelling is what directors do best. You may be on to something.

6. William D'Andrea - October 15, 2016

If you’re interested in Sherlock Holmes, please check out:

http://www.webook.com/project/The-Case-of-the-Dreadful-Poet

nrhatch - October 15, 2016

No time today, but I’ll try to swing by at some point.

7. Bun Karyudo - October 15, 2016

Oh, I don’t know. Anyone who could survive plummeting from a ledge at the Reichenbach Falls must know something about aquatics safety.

nrhatch - October 15, 2016

Yes! People should always be alert to the fact that plummeting from ledge to falls requires some measure of gliding ability in the air AND swimming ability once one reaches the bottom.

Gold star to Bun!

8. colonialist - October 15, 2016

No doubt they will have Sherlock examining the attire (lack of) of most of the cast, and arriving at the brilliant deduction that they intend to go swimming. Whereupon he will earnestly advise them to go on a mathematics course on the basis that there is safety in numbers.

nrhatch - October 15, 2016

Ha! When we swim in the Gulf, we take “safety in numbers” into account by staying in the shallows with the minnows . . . rather than heading out farther to swim with the sharks.

colonialist - October 16, 2016

Leaving a nice protective layer of minnows to take the first attacks, as comes naturally to politicians.

nrhatch - October 17, 2016

Why didn’t the shark eat the politician?
It would have left a bad taste in his mouth.

9. diannegray - October 15, 2016

I’ll leave this investigation up to you my dear Nancy, but remember this – when you have eliminated the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth… 😀

nrhatch - October 15, 2016

Perfect Sherlockian observation, Dianne!

10. Behind the Story - October 15, 2016

A delightful exchange between the curious lawyer and the warmly dressed actor.

nrhatch - October 16, 2016

If he’d had on all those heavy woolen layers the week before, he wouldn’t have had to rely on any acting skills in order to emulate the Wicked Witch of the West or Frosty the Snowman . . .

“I’m M~E~L~T~I~N~G!”

11. Under the Oaks - October 16, 2016

LOL! I can see you being all interested in what they were up to!!! If you hadn’t asked, CH would have!

nrhatch - October 16, 2016

I can see that, Pix! BFF hung back but as soon as I spied the tent and film crew, I headed over to see what was going on. I didn’t expect to find Matt Damon filming an A-List production, but you never know.

After we watched a take or two, we continued our walk . . . delighted not to be encumbered by a wardrobe of wool.

12. Debra - October 16, 2016

What an odd pairing! Something seems very off to me, but you’ve got to give them credit, I suppose, for choosing a beautiful setting at least. Maybe that makes up for the strange setup?

nrhatch - October 17, 2016

I cut off my investigation prematurely so BFF and I could continue our walk, with the result that I’ve left us all in the dark . . . with the beach as a backdrop.

Perhaps it’s as simple as choosing “recognizable role models” (Mickey Mouse, Donald Duck, Sherlock Holmes) to advocate for X, Y, or Z to influence kids to make safe choices.

13. L. Marie - October 17, 2016

Actually Sherlock Holmes was a very good swimmer, from what I remember of the stories. 🙂

nrhatch - October 17, 2016

Thanks, Linda. It’s been ages since I’ve read the books . . . watching Sherlock (BBC) and Elementary and Mr. Holmes and other movies didn’t clue me in to Sherlock’s swimming prowess.

14. Tammy - October 23, 2016

hmmm. Not sure where to go with that one Nancy.

nrhatch - October 23, 2016

They were filming in the town of Holmes Beach ~ maybe that’s why they chose Sherlock Holmes!


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