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One Thing Leads To Another March 31, 2016

Posted by nrhatch in Gratitude, Humor, Magick & Mystery, Music & Dance.
38 comments

Brian-with-coffee-and-newspaperA few weeks ago, after reading ’til the wee hours, I slept late.

Instead of rushing to get ready for water aerobics, I enjoyed a cup of coffee, checked the weather, and settled in to respond to blog comments.

As soon as my butt hit the office chair, my Inner Voice piped up and told me to get off my ass and go swim.

So I did.

During the class, I learned that Nancy Donaruma (a neighbor who played with the NY Philharmonic for over 30 years) planned to give a cello concert that afternoon . . . just down the street.

We jumped at the chance to hear her play and enjoyed every note!

Before leaving the concert, a neighbor invited us to a cello recital by Nancy Donaruma at her house tomorrow, April Fool’s Day.

Mickey-OKWhen we go with the flow, listen to intuition, and allow life to unfold, we often find that we are in the right place at the right time.

No fooling!

Aah . . . that’s better!

Related:  The Paramedic Cellist (Allegro)

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Snowbirds! March 29, 2016

Posted by nrhatch in Animals, Humor, Nature.
44 comments

Brown Pelicans hang out in the Sunshine State year round.  That’s why they boast a perpetual bronze tan.

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Their cousins, the larger light-colored White Pelicans, visit for only a few months each winter, never staying long enough to develop tan lines.

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Like their human counterparts, White Pelicans (and other Snowbirds) fly south to avoid frigid temps and icy terrain up north.

Smart.

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Aah . . . that’s better!

Communication Is Key March 26, 2016

Posted by nrhatch in Humor, Joke, People.
37 comments

170px-PuckCoverA judge, interviewing a South Carolina woman regarding her pending divorce, asks, “What are the grounds for your divorce?”

“About four acres and a nice little home in the middle of the property with a stream running by.”

“No,” he said, “I mean what is the foundation of this case?”

“Concrete, brick, and mortar.”

“I mean,” he continued, “what are your relations like?”

Tiggers-R-Us“I have an aunt and uncle and 12 cousins living here in town, as well as my husband’s parents.  They’re all good folk.”

The judge took a deep breath and asked, “Do you have a real grudge?”

“No, we have a two-car carport and have never really needed one cuz we don’t have a car.”

“Please,” he tried again, “is there any infidelity in your marriage?”

Woodstock-&-Snoopy2“Yes, my son and daughter both have stereo sets. We don’t like the music – all that hip hop and rap tap – but we can’t seem to do anything about it.”

“Ma’am, does your husband ever beat you up?”

“Yes, every morning.”

“Every morning?”

“Yes, he gets up every morning before I do and makes the coffee.”

The judge asked, “Is your husband a nagger?”

“Oh, hell no, he’s as white as you and me!”

Little-Miss-ScatterbrainFinally, in frustration, the judge asked, “Lady, why in hell do you want a divorce?

“I don’t want a divorce.  I’ve never wanted a divorce, my husband does. The damn fool says he can’t communicate with me.”

Aah . . . that’s better!

Source:  E-mail from unknown author (sent by Joe M.)

 

The “Eh” Team March 23, 2016

Posted by nrhatch in Food & Drink, Humor, Music & Dance.
41 comments

The Canadian contingency threw a Ceileidh (pronounced Kay-Lee) for our street this month.

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A Ceileidh is a “kitchen party” full of food, fun, frivolity, and music.

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After a slide show of the Maritime Provinces, Dino took the stage for a sing-a-long . . . complete with a fiddler fiddling-a-long.

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Then Harry Chapin and Todd Rundgren took the stage to sing a few bawdy tunes for us.

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The funniest part of the evening came at the end when the Canadian contingency (a/k/a The “EH” Team) gathered for a group shot.

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It took some time to get everyone on board ~> “Let’s see, who’s missing?” . . . “Are my glasses on straight?” . . . “Where’s Louise?”

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“Hey Cam, c’mon . . . the camera’s waiting for you!”

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“So, do we have everyone?”

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“Hey . . . no photo bombing us with a full moon shot!”

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“Seriously?!  Stop talking and start smiling!”

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“OK!  That’s a Ceileidh keeper!”

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Aah . . . that’s better, eh?

Maintaining Balance March 21, 2016

Posted by nrhatch in Life Balance, Magick & Mystery, Mindfulness.
37 comments

Sometimes feelings are “off kilter” because the thoughts we’ve attached to the “what is” are not balanced.

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We tell ourselves stories about how others “should” act (or how the world should be) and then get upset when reality doesn’t meet our expectations.

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If we change our thoughts, our emotions and feelings follow suit.

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Our “upset” dissipates into the ether.

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Stepping into the role of detached observer allows us to let things be as they are while maintaining our balance.

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We learn that we are stronger than we “thought.”

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Aah . . . that’s better!

FIRE! March 19, 2016

Posted by nrhatch in Humor, Joke.
30 comments

Fire (in public domain)

One dark night outside a small town in Minnesota, a fire started inside the local chemical plant and in a blink of an eye it exploded into massive flames.

The alarm went out to all the fire departments for miles around.

When the volunteer fire fighters appeared on the scene, the chemical company president rushed to the fire chief and said, “All our secret formulas are in the vault in the center of the plant. They must be saved. I will give $50,000 to the fire department that brings them out intact.”

But the roaring flames held the firefighters off.

Soon more fire departments had to be called in as the situation became desperate. As the firemen arrived, the president shouted out that the offer was now $100,000 to the fire department who could bring out the company’s secret files.

From the distance, a lone siren was heard as another fire truck came into sight. It was the nearby Norwegian rural township volunteer fire company composed mainly of Norwegians over the age of 65.

To everyone’s amazement, that little run-down fire engine roared right past all the newer sleek engines that were parked outside the plant.  Without even slowing down it drove straight into the middle of the inferno.

Outside, the other firemen watched as the Norwegian old timers jumped off right in the middle of the fire fought it back on all sides. It was a performance and effort never seen before.

Within a short time, the Norske old timers had extinguished the fire and had saved the secret formulas. The grateful chemical company president announced that for such a superhuman feat he was upping the reward to $200,000, and walked over to personally thank each of the brave fire fighters.

Pluto-RollerskatingThe local TV news reporter rushed in to capture the event on film, asking their chief, “What are you going to do with all that money?”

“Vell,” said Ole Larsen, the 70-year-old fire chief, “Da first thing ve gonna do is fix da brakes on dat dang truck!”

Aah . . . that’s better!

Source:  E-mail from unknown author (sent by Joe M.)

Happy St. Paddy’s Day March 17, 2016

Posted by nrhatch in Food & Drink, Humor, Joke.
44 comments

170px-At&tPhoneAfter digging to a depth of 10 feet last year, American scientists found traces of copper wire dating back 200 years and came to the conclusion that Americans had a telephone network more than 150 years ago.

In the weeks that followed, a Canadian archaeologist dug to a depth of 20 feet, and the Toronto Times reported:

“Canadian archaeologists, finding traces of 250-year-old copper wire, have concluded that their ancestors had an advanced high-tech communications network 50 years earlier than the Americans.”

Frog-CircusOne week later, Irish Dept. Of Mines and Resources in Dublin reported the following:

“After digging as deep as 30 feet in Limerick, Jack Lucknow, a self-taught archaeologist, reported that he found absolutely nothing.

From that, he concluded that 250 years ago . . . Ireland had already gone wireless.”

Aah . . . that’s better!

Source:  E-mail from unknown author (sent by Joe M.)

If you want to get your Irish on . . . here’s a recipe for Irish Soda Bread that’ll have you dancing an Irish Jig.  It mixes up faster than a leprechaun guarding his pot of gold can sing, “Erin Go Bragh.”

Where Peace & Joy Reside March 15, 2016

Posted by nrhatch in Meditation, Mindfulness.
37 comments

Meditation trains the mind not to dwell in the past or the future, but to live in the eternal NOW.

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Here + Now => where peace and joy reside!

When we put peace of mind ahead of all else, we discover the power that lies within. ~ Joseph V. Bailey

Aah . . . that’s better!

Related:  The Pursuit of Happiness

 

Sleeping Like A Rock . . . Rocks! March 12, 2016

Posted by nrhatch in Humor, Joke.
36 comments

Scruffy-CatFour guys at deer camp had to bunk up, two to a room.  No one wanted to room with Dan because he snored so loudly.  They decided it wasn’t fair to make one of them stay with Dan the whole time so they agreed to take turns.

Sam came to breakfast the next morning with his hair standing on end and bloodshot eyes.

The other two said, “Man, you look like hell warmed over!”

“Dan snored so loud, I just sat up and watched him all night.”

Grumpy gusThe next night, it was Joe’s turn.

In the morning, same thing ~ hair standing up and bloodshot eyes.

The other two said, “Man, you look awful!”

“OMG!  Dan’s snores shook the roof.  I didn’t get a wink of sleep.  I just sat up and watched him all night.”

The third night was Frank’s turn.  Frank was a big burly ex-football player.  A man’s man.

Pluto-SnoozingThe next morning, Frank came to breakfast bright-eyed and bushy-tailed, issuing a hearty “Good Morning!”

Joe and Sam couldn’t believe it.  He looked rested and alert.  Not bleary-eyed and tired.

“Frank, you look great.  What happened last night?”

Donald-Duck-BaseballFrank laughed.

“Well, as we got ready for bed, I tucked Dan in, patted his ass, and kissed him good night.  He sat up and watched me all night!”

Aah . . . that’s the ticket!

Source:  E-mail from unknown author (sent by Joe M.)

You Are NOT “All That” March 9, 2016

Posted by nrhatch in Mindfulness, People, Spirit & Ego.
30 comments

RWS_Tarot_01_MagicianMy nieces and nephews adored us when they were too little to know any better.

Now, with the utmost discernment, they let us know that we are NOT “all that” any more.

Should we be hurt?

Of course not.

Just because Ego enjoyed the adoration that flowed from their younger selves doesn’t mean that Ego is entitled to it for the duration.

* If Ego wants something, and gets it, Ego may be happy for a time. Until a new desire arises.

* If Ego wants something, and we withhold it, Ego may be unhappy for a time. Until a new distraction arises.

The cause of Ego’s happiness or unhappiness is the thoughts Ego chooses to think.

Donald-Duck-MadEgo is a toddler, often in the throes of the terrible twos.  Giving in to Ego’s incessant demands each time Ego insists it “needs” something, doesn’t help in the long run.

Once Ego’s current “needs” have been met, Ego will desire something else and something else and something else.

What Ego really needs is to grow up and realize that it makes no sense to put its happiness in someone else’s pocket.

Mickey-OKThe pain of rejection at the level of Ego is often the catalyst for spiritual growth.

Once Ego realizes that happiness lies within, it begins to see through the illusion that it “needs” anything other than what it already has.

With that shift in perspective, self-created suffering dissipates into the ether.

We realize that we ARE “all that” . . . and MORE!

Aah . . . that’s better!