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Drinking And Golf November 21, 2015

Posted by nrhatch in Humor, Joke.

The-Pink-PantherA man was walking down the street when he was accosted by a particularly dirty and shabby-looking homeless man who asked him for a couple of dollars for dinner.

The man took out his wallet, extracted ten dollars and asked, “If I give you this money, will you buy beer with it instead of dinner?”

“No, I had to stop drinking years ago,” the homeless man replied.

Golf-Ball“Will you spend this on green fees at a golf course instead of food?” the man asked.

“Are you NUTS!” replied the homeless man. “I haven’t played golf in 20 years!”

“Well,” said the man, “I’m not going to give you money. Instead, I’m going to take you home for a shower and a terrific dinner cooked by my wife.”

The homeless man was astounded. “Won’t your wife be furious with you for doing that?

Mickey-OK“That’s okay. It’s important for her to see what a man looks like after he has given up drinking and golf.”

Aah . . . that’s better!

Source: ย E-mail from unknown author (sent by Joe M.)


1. Don - November 21, 2015

Lol. Good one Nancy.

nrhatch - November 21, 2015

Happy Saturday, Don!

2. bwcarey - November 21, 2015

great post, made me laugh!

nrhatch - November 21, 2015

Enjoy your weekend!

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4. Grannymar - November 21, 2015

That made me smile on a cold and snowy day!

nrhatch - November 21, 2015

Och, mon . . . tis too soon for snow! Stay warm, GM.

Grannymar - November 21, 2015

I’m trying.

5. colonialist - November 21, 2015

Perfect. Then spruce him up with a new golfing outfit, take him for a round of golf, and a few rounds of beer, and take the smart happy fellow home again – just to drive the point home!

nrhatch - November 21, 2015

Here’s to never giving up things we still enjoy!

6. Kate Crimmins - November 21, 2015

Woot woot!

nrhatch - November 21, 2015

I have to send this to my older brother . . . the only golfer in the family. Have a great weekend, Kate.

7. Under the Oaks - November 21, 2015

This one I will show to CH! Good Morning!

nrhatch - November 21, 2015

Afternoon, Pix! Hope CH gets a kick out of it. Have a fun one.

8. anotherday2paradise - November 21, 2015

Hahaha. Nancy, you crack me up. ๐Ÿ˜†

nrhatch - November 21, 2015

Excellent! Thanks, Sylvia.

9. wheremyfeetare - November 21, 2015

Ha ha! Good one, Nancy. I’ll be sharing this with my brother, the golfer. Enjoy the weekend.

nrhatch - November 21, 2015

Hope it’s a “hole in one” with your brother. Happy weekend!

10. livelytwist - November 21, 2015

I’m in stitches XD

nrhatch - November 21, 2015

Yay! Nothing like a funny golf “hook” to put us in the zone.

11. Kate @ Did That Just Happen? - November 21, 2015

hahahahahahahaha! Love that!!

nrhatch - November 21, 2015

Glad you got a chuckle out of this golfer’s sideways logic. :mrgreen:

12. diannegray - November 21, 2015

Haaaa – made me laugh! Clever man ๐Ÿ˜€

nrhatch - November 21, 2015

Perhaps a stop at the 19th hole keeps golfers “off the streets.”

13. Jill Weatherholt - November 21, 2015

Being a golfer myself, I loved this one, Nancy. I’ll share it with Derek and my father.

nrhatch - November 21, 2015

This golfer’s logic has a creative bent to it . . . .

14. jannatwrites - November 21, 2015

I wasn’t expecting that- good one!

nrhatch - November 21, 2015

Hi Janna! Loved your post this week ~ you know how to set a stage and then spin things around.

Here’s to putting a creative spin on things ~ like this golfer!

jannatwrites - November 21, 2015

Thanks, Nancy. I was just happy to finally finish a story ๐Ÿ™‚

15. Val Boyko - November 21, 2015

A hole in one joke Nancy! ๐Ÿ˜†

nrhatch - November 22, 2015

He shoots . . . he scores!

16. reocochran - November 22, 2015

I agree, aah! The real reason comes out in the end! The man may feel this is worth showing wife feeling his actions will be justified but just imagine what other results may happen, with wife taking action? ! ๐Ÿ™‚

nrhatch - November 22, 2015

Hubby and guest may have to “go out” to eat. ๐Ÿ˜‰

17. BunKaryudo - November 22, 2015

I just hope it wasn’t the green fees that drove him into homelessness in the first place!

nrhatch - November 22, 2015

Yes! Or perhaps his obsession with the sport caused him to play hooky from work one too many times?

BunKaryudo - November 22, 2015

That’s a possibility, isn’t it? I think the husband will definitely have to investigate a little more before arranging dinner with his wife.

nrhatch - November 23, 2015

Yes . . . his logic has a few holes in it.

18. Carol Ferenc - November 22, 2015

Funny! Golfers are a dedicated bunch!

nrhatch - November 22, 2015

Yes! They are committed to the sport’s ups and downs.

19. Anne Lene @ MinimalistSometimes - November 22, 2015

Ha, ha, ha… I think I need to start drinking and playing golf ๐Ÿ˜‰

nrhatch - November 22, 2015

Yes! It’ll keep you off the streets!

20. Debra - November 22, 2015

What a good one! Very clever tactic. ๐Ÿ™‚

nrhatch - November 23, 2015

Twisted logic at it’s best!

21. Tiny - November 22, 2015

Haha! That was a plan alright, but I’m not sure it’ll work ๐Ÿ™‚

nrhatch - November 23, 2015

Wives are quite capable of ignoring pretzel logic like this!

22. beeblu - November 23, 2015

Never give up, I say! ๐Ÿ˜„

nrhatch - November 23, 2015

Glad you’re still getting out on the greens! With the kangas and roos.

23. Barb - November 23, 2015

This is so hilarious AND true.

nrhatch - November 24, 2015

Have you met many golfers who believe they’ll end up homeless if they quit driving and drinking?

What say their spouses? ๐Ÿ˜›

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