It’s Halloween! October 31, 2015
Posted by nrhatch in Humor.comments closed
Don’t be S~C~A~R~E~D!
But beware of things that go *BUMP* in the night!
If you see ghosts, ghouls, or goblins . . .
Or other gruesome sights . . .
Just keep rocking and rolling!
Aah . . . that’s better!
LOLAPIMP October 29, 2015
Posted by nrhatch in Happiness, Humor, Joke.comments closed
Sometimes I laugh so hard I can’t “contain” myself.
I’m laughing so hard that commencing Kegel maneuvers is beyond my ken.
Between gales of laughter, I just have to “let go” and “go with the flow.”
“OMG! I’m LOLAPIMP!” *
Let’s hope our Funny Bone Chakras NEVER dry up on us.
Life is better with laughter.
Aah . . . that’s better!
* LOLAPIMP = Laughing Out Loud And Peeing In My Pants
A Baker’s Dozen October 27, 2015
Posted by nrhatch in Happiness, Humor, Life Balance, People.comments closed
1. We each have the same number of choices to make each moment of each waking hour: What to think about NOW . . . and NOW . . . and NOW . . . and NOW.
2. If we think grateful, kind, compassionate thoughts, we are happier than when we think about all the reasons why we are disgruntled with the current state of affairs. Don’t rush to take offense.
3. There is no Universal Mandate for all. We each need to be guided from within based on our values, our experiences, and our truths (which may change over time).
4. Embrace the present moment. Release your grip on the past. Keep moving forward. No thing’s meant to last.
5. Attempting to satisfy Ego is futile ~ Ego is a mask; it can never be satisfied. With no Ego, we ride the crest of the now . . . with bliss as our constant companion. We desire only what we already possess. Here. Now. Just Be.
6. The BEST thing about not working ~> MORE time to do LESS.
7. I limit my shopping frustration by limiting my shopping and NEVER going when I’m in a rush. Most weeks we shop only for groceries. And cat treats.
8. I’m OK with the idea that I am not going to change the world. Instead I try to make a difference in the lives of people I see every day.
9. The pope’s decision to label someone a “saint” (or a “sinner”) has no impact on how I view the world ~> his decision is irrelevant since I can’t imagine using the Roman Catholic Church or its edicts as a yardstick for my life.
10. If IT makes me feel GOOD now, IT is good for me NOW. This yardstick helps me enjoy things in moderation . . . because too much of any IT makes me feel bad NOW.
11. Reading a cat’s mind is easy. All you need is a Magic 8 Ball, Tarot cards, tea leaves, or a pair of dice.
It’s a crap shoot since cats are FICKLE. And they use the same barometer I do: “If IT makes me feel GOOD now, IT is good for me NOW.”
12. You can only reason with reason-able people. Ego is not reason-able. Neither is your cat.
13. Quotes are like post-its for the mind ~ they help us remember the lessons we’ve learned.
Aah . . . that’s better!
Compounding & Confounding Interest October 24, 2015
Posted by nrhatch in Humor, Joke, Less IS More, People.comments closed
On their wedding night, a bride asked her husband for $20 for their first lovemaking encounter.
He agreed.
This scenario was repeated each time they made love, for more than 40 years ~ he viewed it as a cute way for her to afford new clothes and shoes.
You know, more STUFF!
Arriving home at noon one day, the wife found her husband falling off the couch drunk.
“I’ve been let go. Corporate downsizing. Those bastards! I’m 64. I’ll never find a position that pays anywhere near what I’ve been earning. We’re ruined!”
His wife smiled and handed him a bank book with forty years of steady deposits and interest.
The account totaled nearly $1 million.
Shocked, her husband stared at the total and then said:
“If I’d had any idea what you were doing, I would have given you ALL my business!”
That’s when she gave him the business!
Aah . . . that’s better!
Source: e-mail from unknown author (sent by Joe M.)
You know, some men just don’t know when to keep their mouths shut.
Less IS more.
More Joy, Less Stuff October 21, 2015
Posted by nrhatch in Health & Wellness, Humor, Less IS More, Mindfulness.comments closed
Clutter often stems from fear. We keep things “just in case,” but at a cost.
When our homes are uncluttered, we feel calm, relaxed, and centered.
Instead of feeling overwhelmed, stressed out, frazzled, and on edge.
We save time and money when we shop less and enjoy what we already have.
Eliminating the extraneous makes room for the essential.
Getting rid of what we don’t need, use, or want gives us more space to be who we want to be and do what we want to do.
Aah . . . that’s better!
Quote to Ponder: Until you are happy with who you are . . . you will never be happy with what you have.
Related: Life is Easier When You Take the Stairs (Raptitude)
How To Lose Weight FAST October 19, 2015
Posted by nrhatch in Happiness, Home & Garden, Humor, Sustainable Living.comments closed
Next time you feel stressed, overweight, or sluggish, give Reverse Retail Therapy a try:
1. Fill a box with stuff you no longer need.
2. Donate it to a local thrift or consignment store.
3. There . . . you feel lighter already, don’t you?
Aah . . . that’s better!
For more: How To DeClutter (Think Simple Now) * Out of Sight is Not Out of Mind (Raptitude) * Everything You Own is a Relationship You’re In (Raptitude)
Help! October 17, 2015
Posted by nrhatch in Gratitude, Humor, Magick & Mystery.comments closed
A woman hurried to the pharmacy to get medication, got back to her car and found that she had locked her keys inside.
She found a rusty coat hanger on the ground, picked it up, and realized she didn’t know how to use it.
She asked the Universe to send HELP.
Within 5 minutes a beat-up motorcycle pulled up. A bearded man wearing an old biker skull rag got off the cycle and walked toward her.
Too anxious to be afraid, she said,”Can you help me? My daughter is sick and I’ve locked my keys in the car. I must get home. Can you use this hanger to unlock my car?”
“Sure.” He flexed the hanger and unlocked the car in less than a minute.
She smiled and said, “The Universe sent the right man for the job.”
The man chuckled at the irony. “I just got out of prison this week . . . after doing time for car theft.”
The woman laughed, “That’s great! The Universe sent a Professional!”
Aah . . . that’s better!
Source: E-mail from unknown author (sent by Joe M.)
Dance With Me October 15, 2015
Posted by nrhatch in Humor, Less IS More, Magick & Mystery.comments closed
I’ve been weeding out our CD collection to shed songs that don’t resonate any more.
I put Orleans in the “maybe” pile.
After consultation with BFF, we moved Orleans into the “donate” pile.
We still like 2 songs on the CD (“You’re Still The One” and “Dance With Me”) but not enough to pull the CD off the shelf.
Just enough to enjoy over the airways.
The next day, on the way to Lowe’s to get handles for the bathroom vanities, I joked, “What do you bet we hear Orleans on the radio?”
We turned on the radio, got distracted in conversation, and turned the volume down a minute later.
But as we walked into Lowe’s, I said, “LISTEN!”
Sure enough, the tune playing over the store’s radio ~> “Dance With Me” by Orleans.
Aah . . . that’s better!
Yoga October 13, 2015
Posted by nrhatch in Exercise & Fitness, Health & Wellness, Life Balance.comments closed
Yoga increases flexibility, decreases pain, improves circulation and balance, elevates mood, stretches and strengthens muscles, boosts energy, and improves our over-all health and well-being.
If you’re interested in incorporating Yoga into your life, aim to learn at least ONE new pose a week.
To increase your motivation, start with something really relaxing.
Like Tree Pose.
Or Mountain Pose.
Or, better still, Dead Man’s Pose.
So simple . . . even a starfish can do it!
Aah . . . that’s better!
Watch What You Eat! October 10, 2015
Posted by nrhatch in Health & Wellness, Humor, Joke.comments closed
A Doctor was addressing a large audience in Tampa.
“The material we put into our stomachs is enough to have killed most of us sitting here, years ago.”
“Red meat is awful. Soft drinks corrode your stomach lining. Chinese food is loaded with MSG.”
“High fat diets can be disastrous, and most of us don’t realize the long-term harm caused by pollutants in our drinking water. However, there is one thing we all have eaten or will eat that is the most dangerous of all. Can anyone here tell me what food causes the most grief and suffering for years after eating it?”
After several seconds of quiet, a 75-year-old man in the front row raised his hand and softly said, “Wedding Cake.”
Aah . . . that’s better!
Source: E-mail from unknown author (sent by Joe M.)
Spirit Lights The Way 