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Ramblings of a Retired Mind March 21, 2015

Posted by nrhatch in Humor, Joke, Life Balance, People.


(1) You know you are getting old when everything either dries up or leaks.

(2) The older you get the tougher it is to lose weight because by then your body and your fat have gotten to be really good friends.

(3) Old age => you still have something on the ball but you are just too tired to bounce it.

Mr-Rossi(4) If you live long enough, you reach a point when you stop lying about your age and start bragging about it.

(5) Some people try to turn back their “odometers.” Not me. I want people to know why I look this way => I’ve traveled a long way and some of the roads weren’t paved.

(6) Next time you complete a form that asks who to call in an emergency, fill in the blank with . . . “an ambulance.”

(7) The older we get, the more often things go missing.  I’ve found that the easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy a replacement.


(8) You know how when first time visitors see a cat litter box, they say, “Oh, have you got a cat?”

Next time I’m going to respond, “No, it’s for company.”

Aah . . . that’s better!

E-mail from unknown author (sent by Joe M.)



1. Jill Weatherholt - March 21, 2015

Great ramblings, Nancy. I love number five!

nrhatch - March 21, 2015

Exactly! Why would I want to try to convince someone I’m “21” when I look much older. :/

2. Val Boyko - March 21, 2015

Love this list Nancy.
I laughed at them all!
#7 is called strategy.
Our minds don’t retire … its everything else that starts to give up.

nrhatch - March 21, 2015

Glad you enjoyed! I love sharing a few chuckles on Saturday mornings ~ life is better with laughter . . . no matter our age.

3. suzicate - March 21, 2015

Numbers 2 and 7 are so true for me!

nrhatch - March 21, 2015

Me too! A watched pot never boils . . . and missing items appear once we no longer need them.

4. Kate @ Did That Just Happen? - March 21, 2015

In case of an emergency call… an ambulance!! hahahahahaha! This was awesome!!

nrhatch - March 21, 2015

Morning, Kate! Hope that Mr. T’s ankle is feeling less sprained and strained.

Kate @ Did That Just Happen? - March 22, 2015

Thank you!

5. Kate Crimmins - March 21, 2015

This is either one of your best or maybe I can relate to too many of them!

nrhatch - March 21, 2015

Yay! Glad you enjoyed, Kate. #3 resonates with me ~> there are lots of balls I could still bounce if I had the inclination . . . but I prefer to conserve energy. :mrgreen:

6. granny1947 - March 21, 2015

Love them.

nrhatch - March 21, 2015

Hi Granny! Hope all is well on your side of the world today. 😎

7. Pix Under the Oaks - March 21, 2015

#1, OMGosh… #1!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! #8.. LOL!

nrhatch - March 21, 2015

I take it #1 struck a chord with you, Pix. Me too!

Today = Rise Pies for lunch!!! We’re heading down to UTC in an hour to meet up with my aunt, uncle, cousins, and sister’s family.

Pix Under the Oaks - March 21, 2015

Have fun! I want a Rise Pies so bad. We had pizza last night but didn’t even begin to come close to Rise Pies! Lucky Lucky you!!!!

nrhatch - March 21, 2015

It was fun ~ everyone enjoyed the pies and we had a nice 3 hour catch up.

Next time you’re down, we can do Rise Pies . . . or you can make a pit stop on your way south.

8. NancyTex - March 21, 2015

#6 is just plain smart. I’m totally doing that.

nrhatch - March 21, 2015

It’s a sensible response. BFF and I have never been great in emergencies. EMT’s are trained professionals.

9. reocochran - March 21, 2015

This got me chuckling! Thanks for the smiles and this made my Spring day!

nrhatch - March 21, 2015

Happy Spring, Robin! Enjoy the weekend.

10. anotherday2paradise - March 21, 2015

Thanks for the wry smiles, Nancy. 🙂

nrhatch - March 21, 2015

Starting the day with a smile makes the day flow. Enjoy.

11. Grannymar - March 21, 2015

Don’t mention number 7. I have just replaced my lost prescription sunglasses. I grinned lightly behind my hands, just in case the others saw me and decided to become real.

nrhatch - March 21, 2015

Haha! I see your surreptitious smile.

12. Barb - March 21, 2015

This cracked me up Nancy, I can so relate but #1 and #7 nailed it!
Thanks for the chuckles on my Sunday morning….

nrhatch - March 21, 2015

My pleasure, Barb. Glad to get your Sunday off to a sunny start.

13. beeblu - March 21, 2015
nrhatch - March 21, 2015

Interesting article, BB. My mother has long suspected that the reason her reasoning slowed down was overflowing filing cabinets in the brain. Perhaps she was right:

“A year ago, German scientists argued that cognitive “deficits” in aging were caused largely by the accumulation of knowledge — that is, the brain slows down because it has to search a larger mental library of facts. That idea has stirred some debate among scientists.”

14. Hariod Brawn - March 22, 2015

The first sign of old age here in England is when the supermarket check-out staff start patronising you horribly as if some helpless half-wit: “Do you need help packing?(that loaf of bread).”

nrhatch - March 22, 2015

Publix supermarkets avoid that problem by packing everyone’s groceries AND offering assistance to all ~ “Would you like help getting your groceries to the car” No ruffled feathers.

15. L. Marie - March 22, 2015

Ha! Hilarious! Sadly I can relate to numbers 2 and 7. I recently replaced something I thought was lost only to discover it in its usual place.

nrhatch - March 22, 2015

Those resonate here too ~> it’s always in the last place we look
. . . even if we looked there first.

16. sufilight - March 22, 2015

I like number four. If I get to live long into my 80’s or 90’s, I probably will brag about my age.

nrhatch - March 22, 2015

We’ve got a guy on our street who still rides his bike and enjoys sharing his age with us ~> he turned 96 last June!

17. Tiny - March 23, 2015

Oh dear, I got me a good laugh! I hope I’ll be able to brag about my age at some point…my dad has just recently started…he’s going on 92 now.

nrhatch - March 23, 2015

My great aunt lived to be 94 . . . but she never admitted to more than “21 plus.” :mrgreen:

18. Behind the Story - March 23, 2015

Thanks for the laugh. I like # 7. I don’t usually go out and buy a replacement, but I feel better just thinking about the possibility.

nrhatch - March 23, 2015

I’m with you, Nicki. I don’t run out to replace anything right away because I often find I can live without it . . . which is when it turns up.

19. livelytwist - March 23, 2015

Is this what I have to look forward to? XD

nrhatch - March 23, 2015

Judging from the comments, these “happenings” appear to be part of the human experience for many of us. 😛

20. Three Well Beings - March 24, 2015

Pretty funny! I relate to losing things and buying replacements! I am notorious for that one! 🙂

nrhatch - March 24, 2015

Last week, we watched a show on a hoarder whose piles stopped just 4 feet shy of the ceiling. As the two hosts walked over her mountains of rubbish, looking like Gulliver landing in Lilliput, I thought about how hard it must be to keep track of so much stuff. :/

This week, we’ve made TWO trips to Goodwill with donations, with a third in the offing. :mrgreen:

21. Tammy - March 24, 2015

We live in the land of people who don’t want to be associated with their ages – drives me crazy.

nrhatch - March 24, 2015

Silly rabbits. It’s especially odd when they have surgeons carve up their faces to the point they become unrecognizable. Odd.

22. nrhatch - March 25, 2015

A very funny weatherman shares his thoughts on aging:

23. jannatwrites - April 3, 2015

That’s it… I need to add a few years to my age so people will think I’ve aged well 🙂

nrhatch - April 3, 2015

Great strategy, Janna. Instead of subtracting years, add a few extra!

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