Something’s Screwy With This Key February 14, 2015
Posted by nrhatch in Humor, Joke.trackback
A woman in her early forties went to a plastic surgeon for a face-lift. The surgeon told her about a new procedure called “The Key,” where a small key placed on the back of a woman’s head can be turned to tighten her skin to create the effect of a brand new face lift.
Of course, the woman wanted “The Key.”
Over the years, the woman tightened the key with wonderful results – the woman remained young and vibrant looking.
After fifteen years, the woman returned to the surgeon with two problems.
“For 15 years, everything has worked fine. I’d turn the key and love the result. But now I’ve developed two annoying problems. First, I have these terrible bags under my eyes and the key won’t get rid of them.”
The doctor looked at her closely and said, “Those aren’t bags, those are your breasts.”
She nodded. “No point asking about the beard then . . .”
Aah . . . that’s better!
E-mail from unknown author (sent by Granny1947)
Happy Valentine’s Day!
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Ha ha! That was great, Nancy! Happy Valentine’s Day to you too! 🙂
Thanks, Jill! Hope your weekend is off to a FAB start and that it offers up a few sweet surprises.
Hahahaha! Shared with hubby. Thanks for giving us both such a good laugh this morning 🙂
Happy Valentines Day!
Glad you enjoyed, Val! Have a warm and wonderful Valentine’s Day.
Love is such a big word, it really should have more letters. ~ Kobi Yamada
Ha ha! Happy Valentine’s Day!
Hey Pix! Hope you and CH have a chance to relax, unwind, and toast your togetherness with a glass of vino this afternoon. Enjoy!
That’s the plan Nancy… after a cheeseburger for lunch and a shared white chocolate mocha at Starbucks. Hope you and BFF have a wonderful day! We will think of you two when we clink glasses at wine time… 🙂
Your celebration sounds “low key” AND delicious . . . like ours!
I’m waiting for it to warm up a bit more before sticking my nose out the door. It’s Not Too Balmy today.
XD
I see you’ve got your own key well in hand!
Bahahahaha!
She should have signed up for Tracy Anderson’s Smooth Moves Boot Camp. 😛
Those two approaches would surely be tied for the least effective prize. 🙂
I did try Tracy’s arm machinations ~ I don’t look like a dancer yet, but it felt like a great stretch.
Bwahahaha, nothing like starting the day with a good laugh…thank you!
Laugh lines are the BEST kind of wrinkles.
Lol – Love your Stories Nancy.:)
Thanks, Don. Sharing smiles is my favorite cyber activity.
That was fabulous! Needed that laugh, thank you. 🙂
Thanks, Tamara! Glad it tickled your funny bone chakra.
I wonder if Michael Jackson had this problem….
Yes! That and too much bleaching. 😛
Oh… I’ve heard a good laugh is great for health and longevity! Even without the key 😀
Humor is the best stress buster on the planet.
Ha ha ha ha ha…! Best laugh I’ve had in a long time! I’m going to have to practice telling this one without messing up the punch line… Happy Valentine’s Day to you and BFF, Nancy… but if it’s just another day for you two, then may I suggest renting I Hate Valentine’s Day and enjoying a good laugh at home tonight…? Thanks for my laugh of the day 😀
Glad you enjoyed!
I loved Nia Vardalos in My Big Fat Greek Wedding . . . I’ll have to check out “I Hate Valentine’s Day.” Thanks for the tip.
BFF and I don’t have any BIG plans for today ~ I did give him a card that caused us both to laugh out loud. It was a bit screwy, like this key.
Thanks for making me almost choke with laughter, Nancy. 😆
Glad you enjoyed, Sylvia! I loved your hearts and flowers today.
Thanks, Nancy. 🙂
Hahaha – the perils of the endless pursuit of youth.
Some of the Hollywood crowd end up looking rather tortured from all the work they’ve had done.
Yes, it never seems to improve their looks, but just makes them look downright weird.
Plastic smiles belong on Barbie dolls.
Oh dear…not a good look at all!
Indeed! Better to age with grace.
LOL! Love it, Nancy! 😀
Hi Dianne! Hope all is well in your corner of the world ~ thanks for swinging by.
That’s it! I’m canceling my appointment for a nip/tuck immediately. I’m sticking with my original face!
U B Smart!
Oh, dear! That’s disgusting … and very funny. Happy Valentine’s Day, Nancy.
Thanks, Nicki.
I’m glad the e-mail didn’t come with a corresponding cartoon. Not sure I’d like to see “the thousand words” represented by the image. 😯
Hahaha!! I laughed so hard I snorted!!!
Huzzah! That seems a most appropriate response. 😛
Hilarious!!!
There are some days when I wish I had a key like that. . . .
Either that or an iron to smooth out the wrinkles. 😛
That is so funny and just the giggle I need today. I want to share it with my friends!
Share away! Glad you got the giggle you needed.
Best not enquire what would turn up next … 🙂
Good idea!
Oh my, that’s just wrong! Funny, but wrong 🙂
Nakedly absurd humor that is barely amusing.
Ouch! 🙂
She’s tight as a drum!
Oh my gosh! This is hilarious. Ah vanity! Sometimes it gets the best of us!
Sometimes when I see what the glitterati have done to themselves via plastic surgery, botox, etc., I cringe.
Since I don’t have the money, I will never be tempted to turn myself into a clown. 😛
Oh, I loved that! Thank you for the laughter which just rang around our sitting room! 🙂
Glad you enjoyed, Sally. Thanks for sharing your compassionate tale on Don’s post.
LOL!!! poor dear. I know I would have missed my breasts 😉
She probably couldn’t think straight . . . being wound so tight!
ROFL!!! Nancy you’ve just cheered me up!
Yay! Glad to share a smile across the ocean, PiP.