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Let It Out . . . Let it Go September 21, 2014

Posted by nrhatch in Happiness, Life Balance, Mindfulness.
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Most of us experience the occasional down day.

The sun is always shining, but sometimes it is obscured by clouds.

Just as a rainy day can be a nice change of pace, so too can a gloomy mood.

Life is enhanced by the ebb and flow of emotions.

We appreciate our sunny dispositions more after a cloudy day . . . as long as we don’t get attached to the idea of being sad.

I read a story one day about puppies that had been mistreated.   Images of the poor wee pups flooded into my brain.

The happiness felt moments earlier evaporated, replaced with overwhelming sadness.  Tears poured down my face.  I sobbed until the pain dissipated.

Pluto-RollerskatingOnce my tears stopped, I returned my attention to what I had been doing before seeing the story.

In other words, a sad thought entered my brain.  The thought made my emotions switch from happy to sad.  I allowed myself to feel that sadness.

Once I acknowledged the sadness, it left.  It moved on.

And, this is the important part, I let it go.

I did not chase after it and bring it back.  I let it go.  I did not get attached to the idea of being sad.  I let it go.

If I hadn’t read the story that morning, I wouldn’t have known about the poor puppies at all.  Nothing in my life changed from the moment before I read about them until the moment after.

I was not being called upon to save them ~ they had already been rescued.

Mickey-LoungingSo, when the sadness started to dissipate on its own, I let it go so that I could get on with my day.

And the sun shone once more.

Aah . . . that’s better!

Quote:  Be happy while you’re living, for you’re a long time dead. ~ Scottish Proverb

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Comments»

1. granny1947 - September 21, 2014

Very wise words my friend.

nrhatch - September 21, 2014

Thanks, Kathy ~ it’s “recycled” wisdom. :mrgreen:

granny1947 - September 21, 2014

Ahhhhh but you found the time to find it and share it.

nrhatch - September 21, 2014

Just my way of giving back! BTW: I hear that today is World Gratitude Day.

2. Silver in the Barn - September 21, 2014

“I did not chase after it and bring it back. I let it go.” That is so key to peace of mind. Of course we have to experience sadness in our lives but we need not wallow in it indefinitely. I love how you describe this, Nancy, it’s exactly how I try to deal with things too.

nrhatch - September 21, 2014

Yes! We all experience sadness and frustration when hopes, dreams, desires, and expectations are hijacked by the “what is.”

It is up to us to reclaim our inner peace / peace of mind.

If someone says, “I’ll never get over this,” those words are apt to become a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Silver in the Barn - September 21, 2014

Absolutely true. And, in fact, some things you never do get over. I wouldn’t say I’ve “gotten over” my daughter’s brain injury because that sort of connotes I’ve returned to how I was before it happened which is not the case. But I have figured out how to live as happily ever after in a drastically altered universe as is possible. That’s OK. Self-pity is such a bore, after all, and while it is cliche, there is so much to be happy about in this life. As you say, dear Nancy, I let it go.

nrhatch - September 21, 2014

You are a SHINING STAR, Barbara.

Your daughter’s situation is an on-going event that must be dealt with (in a “drastically altered universe”) without letting the clouds obscure the sun 24/7. And you do a terrific job of finding “happy” where and when you can.

3. ericjbaker - September 21, 2014

You’ll be crushed under the weight of the world’s burdens in short order if you try to take them all on yourself.

nrhatch - September 21, 2014

Yes! That’s why I left it to others to be outraged by Oscar’s trial testimony and the ensuing verdict. 😛

4. suzicate - September 21, 2014

Wise words. Denying our feelings does ourselves no good, but letting it out and moving on cleanses the soul

nrhatch - September 21, 2014

Thanks, Suzi. I used to try to “bite back” tears when they threatened to spill over. After some trial and error, I realized that sadness departs far sooner when I allow it to enter, have its say, and then proceed on its way.

Sadness, Sadness go away. Come again another day.

5. Jill Weatherholt - September 21, 2014

The most unhappy people are those who never learn to “let it go.” I’ve gotten quite good at hitting the delete button when those thoughts try to take control.
Great post, Nancy!

nrhatch - September 21, 2014

Thanks, Jill. Here’s to “hitting the delete button” and watching our cares go down the drain.

6. Pix Under the Oaks - September 21, 2014

Letting go is a tough one but I am so much better at it now!

nrhatch - September 21, 2014

Yay! Being better at IT is all about “being better.” Aah . . .

7. Eric Tonningsen - September 21, 2014

Alas, letting go is a choice and action that many consider challenging. Simply being aware and regrounding with where you were (or choose to be) can have near-immediate benefit. It doesn’t mean that we have to abandon the thought or deed that took us off track. Practical lesson here!

nrhatch - September 21, 2014

I find that my emotions follow my thoughts.

If I abandon the thought by changing my focus, the emotion dissipates and evaporates without effort. In contrast, if I try to hang on to the thought of abused puppies, the sadness lingers.

I do find that re-writing the “story” in my mind also helps.

If someone cuts me off in traffic, and I imagine them as a selfish horrid driver, one set of emotions arises. In contrast, if I imagine they are racing to ransom their kidnapped teddy bear, a different set of emotions springs to mind.

8. Grannymar - September 21, 2014

Whether recycled or not, it is quite true. A little cry, washes out the tear ducts and allows the eyes to smile and shine!

nrhatch - September 21, 2014

I’ve often been amazed at how quickly e-motions move on through when we remain awake and aware.

Today, I laughed so hard at Barbara’s post (focused on her new potting shed and what to name a pig) that tears came to my eyes.

Laughing until I cry is my favorite way to clean out those tear ducts.

9. diannegray - September 21, 2014

Such important words, Nancy. It’s amazing how something can change inside us when we read or see horror and cruelty. If you don’t let it go it’s like a cracked record that keeps playing over and over again.

nrhatch - September 21, 2014

Sometimes people hang on to sad thoughts out of misplaced guilt ~ they feel compelled to hang on to the kite string.

But I agree, refusing to let go allows the cracked record to keep playing its disharmony.

10. Barbara - September 21, 2014

If we let our personal burdens and that of the world’s overcome us, we might as well lay down and die. Too much is too much. Have a good cry, and learn to let things go and get on to more positive thoughts.

nrhatch - September 21, 2014

Yes! There is ALWAYS something to be sad about. Or mad about. Or glad about. Choosing glad makes more sense to me.

On that note, I’m off for a walk on the beach before dinner.

11. NancyTex - September 21, 2014

Great advice, NH.

nrhatch - September 21, 2014

Thanks. Hope you’re having a good weekend, NT.

12. brickhousechick - September 21, 2014

I couldn’t agree more with you, Nancy! I used to think that I had to always be strong and avoid feelings of sadness no matter the circumstance. I was so wrong. I have since learned and come to understand that you have to sit with your sadness and give it the respect it requires. Validate that your feelings are real and warranted and only then, move on and let it go. 🙂

nrhatch - September 22, 2014

Accepting the ebbs and flows of our e-motions allows them, and us, to keep moving forward ~> Aah . . . that’s better!

13. Three Well Beings - September 23, 2014

That’s a great Scottish proverb! I love it. I think what you’re saying is important. I think children need to be taught that being sad is often the most appropriate response and that we don’t have to fear that emotion. Also, that it will pass! Sometimes sadness is treated like a malady (I’m not talking about real depression) and we add stress trying to talk ourselves out of the feelings associated with sadness. Give it its due and then let it go…valuable lessons, Nancy.

nrhatch - September 23, 2014

Thanks, Debra. Good point.

Many treat sadness as a malady to be avoided at all cost, seeing emotion as a sign of weakness. Others seem prone to manufacture sadness on a perpetual assembly line ~ always finding a reason to be “down” instead of up.

Finding a middle ground makes the most sense to me. When sadness arises of its own accord, feel it fully and let it flow.

14. theonlycin - September 23, 2014

Not always easy, but I am trying to let it go. Thanks for this post, Nancy xxx

nrhatch - September 23, 2014

Hi Cin! The stories we tell ourselves about what happened have a dramatic impact on how we feel about what happened. If we put a positive spin on things, we often feel more at peace.

When dad died, I focused on the fact that he had prostate cancer that had metastasized to the bone. Had he survived, he would have been in increasing pain. That helped me be at peace with his passing.

15. jannatwrites - September 23, 2014

You’re so right – we do need to acknowledge sadness… just like we need to let it go. (I’ve learned to be pretty quick with the remote when ASPCA commercials come on because my younger son tends to dwell on them and I find myself still trying to distract him hours later.).

nrhatch - September 23, 2014

BFF clicks away from those too . . . they are hard to manage.


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