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The Monastery of Silence August 9, 2014

Posted by nrhatch in Humor, Joke.
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150px-Carlo_Crivelli_052When Sister Mary Ellen entered the Monastery of Silence, the Priest said, “This is a silent monastery. You are welcome to stay here as long as you like, but you may not speak unless directed to do so.”

After Sister Mary Ellen had lived in the monastery for 5 years, the Priest said, “Sister, you have been here for 5 years. You may speak two words.”

“Hard bed.”

“I’m sorry to hear that. We will get you a better bed.”

After another 5 years, the Priest summoned Sister Mary Ellen and said, “You may say another two words, Sister Mary Ellen.”

“Cold food.”

The Priest assured her that the food would be better in the future.

On her 15th anniversary, the Priest again called Sister Mary Ellen to his office, “You may say two words today.”

“I quit.”

“‘It’s probably best,” said the Priest.  “You’ve done nothing but bitch since you got here.”

Aah . . . that’s better!

Source: e-mail from an unknown author (sent by Joe M.)

 

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Comments»

1. Rainee - August 9, 2014

Good one Nancy! The like button is playing up again so I thought I best leave a comment instead 🙂

nrhatch - August 9, 2014

I see your avatar up there next to the LIKE button, so it worked at this end. Glad you enjoyed.

2. Val Boyko - August 9, 2014

Hahahaha! Didn’t see that coming… The best kind 🙂
Thank you for the chuckle Nancy 🙂
Val x

nrhatch - August 9, 2014

Have a fun filled day!

3. Don - August 9, 2014

Lol- I love this stuff Nancy. I knew something was coming. 🙂

nrhatch - August 9, 2014

Glad you enjoyed. Hope your weekend is off to a happy start.

4. Silver in the Barn - August 9, 2014

BWAHAHAHAHA! Now that was funny. And I did not see it coming. LOL!

nrhatch - August 9, 2014

Yay! I’m glad it tickled your funny bone chakra, Barbara. This one made me laugh out loud too.

5. Eric Tonningsen - August 9, 2014

My mom tried this ‘game’ with my sisters when they were young. Let’s just say Mother Superior failed. 🙂

nrhatch - August 9, 2014

My mom did just the opposite ~ she asked questions to get me to open up. In response, she’d get monosyllabic answers.

How was school?
Fine.

Do anything exciting?
((eye roll)) No.

Do you have homework?
Yes.

Etc.

“Teen Me” is why I chose not to have kids. 😛

6. Jill Weatherholt - August 9, 2014

That was great, Nancy! Loved it!

nrhatch - August 9, 2014

I hope Joe and Kathy continue to supply me with jokes for Silly Saturday posts.

Jill Weatherholt - August 9, 2014

That really was hilarious!

nrhatch - August 9, 2014

Yay! I’m happy to add a bit of happy to the weekend.

7. Barbara - August 9, 2014

Thanks for the chuckle to start my day Nancy!

nrhatch - August 9, 2014

Glad you enjoyed, Barb. Hope you’re having a fun-filled day.

8. JOriginal Muse - August 9, 2014

LOL… I wonder what Sister Mary Ellen would have said if she got the last word (or two words)…? I know what I would have said 😉

nrhatch - August 9, 2014

hahaha! I’m guessing you’re right. :mrgreen:

9. jannatwrites - August 9, 2014

Haha, good one! I doubt I’d have lasted fifteen years (both in the living conditions and with the sparse words 🙂 )

nrhatch - August 9, 2014

Taking a vow of silence for a week or two might be an interesting exercise. Not speaking for 15 years seems far too long for me.

10. ericjbaker - August 10, 2014

This story was odder nunsense!

nrhatch - August 10, 2014

She had a bad habit!

11. Pix Under the Oaks - August 10, 2014

Ha ha! I like this one, yes I do!

nrhatch - August 10, 2014

Think of all the time she saved not having to think up things to say as she proceeded through her day. And no long drawn out conversations by the water cooler.

12. Three Well Beings - August 11, 2014

This is hilarious! This will remind me to keep my complaints to a minimum this week. No one cares about what ails us! LOL!

nrhatch - August 11, 2014

I got such a kick out of this because most of the whiners and complainers among us are a tad more verbose when they bitch.

13. Grannymar - August 13, 2014

I enjoyed that. It reminded of when I was young. Daddy used to tease me about joining the ‘Poor Clare’ order of nuns, an enclosed order with a vow of silence. I would have quit after fifteen days, never mind fifteen years. Nun such, that is me!

nrhatch - August 13, 2014

If I had to choose between taking a vow of silence OR listening to Sponge Bob Square Pants for hours on end, I’d choose silence.

But I would miss being able to chat about this, that, and the other thing.


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