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No, No . . . NOT the Negative! February 6, 2014

Posted by nrhatch in Gratitude, Happiness, Humor, Life Balance, Mindfulness.

Chinaman-fishingAssume for a moment that something’s happened to “rock your boat.”

Let’s call IT the “what is.”

For purposes of this discussion, it doesn’t much matter if someone cut you off in traffic (or mid-sentence), called you names on the playground, stole your lunch money, or died.

The “what is” is.

IT happened.  And, like much of life, IT is out of your control.  IT cannot be changed.  The question becomes:  How are you going to respond to IT?

How you relate to IT is the issue.

“Attachment is the great fabricator of illusions; reality can be attained only by someone who is detached.” ~ Simone Weil

The-Pink-Panther“To fall into a habit is to begin to cease to be.” ~ Miguel de Unamuno

How we feel about life depends on where we place our focus.

If we get in the habit of focusing on the negatives, life is a dark and dingy place.

If we turn our attention to what is “right” with life, we find ample evidence that life is light and bright.

Focusing on the positives does not mean that we ignore warning signs and symptoms.  We note them, decide on a course of action, and then turn our attention to other matters without dwelling or obsessing on the negative.

Exercise-SunsetA strong positive attitude helps us overcome challenges and bounce back from adversity.

We become strong by stretching our muscles and daily repetition.

If we don’t use a muscle (including our funny bone chakra), we lose it.  It atrophies (and so do we).

“Do not take life too seriously.  You will never get out of it alive.” ~ Elbert Hubbard”

“Life does not cease to be funny when people die any more than it ceases to be serious when people laugh.” ~ George Bernard Shaw


If you want more joy in your life, start now.

Do whatever you’re doing with more joy.  Even if you are peeling potatoes, dusting the living room, or cleaning the toilet.

“There are some days when I think I’m going to die from an overdose of satisfaction.” ~ Salvador Dali

Go easy/easier on yourself and others.  Practice acceptance, patience, simplicity, forgiveness, and gratitude.

Scruffy-Cat“If at first you don’t succeed you’re running about average.” ~ M.H. Alderson

“What a wonderful life I’ve had!  I only wish I’d realized it sooner.” ~ Colette

Find peace with the “what is” . . . whatever IT is.

Aah . . . that’s better!

Yesterday, BFF and I had a 2nd Blog Meet Up with Pix and CH from the Tiny Ten in Missouri (Sweet Days Under The Oaks).  Pix met Tigger for the 1st time and found him to be a happy little guy.  (Much happier than the scruffy cat in the avatar above.)

After giving Tigger a treat and a pat on the head, we swung by a Clyde Butcher exhibit at the Studio at Gulf and Pine where we spied a photograph offered for sale at . . . $130,000!  We didn’t buy it.  We popped into the AMI Historical Museum and wandered the Anna Maria Pier before returning to the villa for Heavenly Cupcakes and Wine Time!  A Fine Time.


1. Don - February 6, 2014

Needed that this morning, Nancy. Thank you.

nrhatch - February 6, 2014

I just read your post . . . and can see why you needed a dose of positive. I cannot face “the news” at the outset of a new day.

2. Crowing Crone Joss - February 6, 2014

We don’t often choose what happens to us and this is a great reminder that we do get to choose what to do about “it” and how to live life. I always say life brings us enough seriousness on its own, we don’t need to add to it!

nrhatch - February 6, 2014

Thanks, Joss. I do view my sense of humor as my most valuable asset and ally. Without it, I’m sure I would SINK.

3. Pix Under the Oaks - February 6, 2014

We’ll Nancy I focused on the positive this morning and said “I think I can, I KNOW I can get this comment on your blog from my phone! We had a wonderful time yesterday with you and BFF. Tigger is Tiggerific and your home is such a peaceful beautiful place with the Reserve as your backyard. I could live there… : ) Anna Maria Island was much more fun this year with you two and Tiggerific. Thanks so much for the warm welcome and the gift of humor! Friends like you two change our lives for the better for the rest of our lives!

nrhatch - February 6, 2014

Yay! I’m glad you succeeded in posting from your phone and I’m really glad that you and CH had a chance to spend the afternoon with us. We had a blast!

Here’s to changing our lives for the better!

4. Morgan - February 6, 2014

Marvelous 🙂 Thank You for the positive boost this morning 😀

nrhatch - February 6, 2014

You’re welcome, Morgan! I love to provide a positive boost from time to time.

5. William D'Andrea - February 6, 2014

The thought has occurred to me, that if I never saw any news reports, and all I knew about the world was based on what was happening in my own life, I would think that the world is an increasingly benevolent place.
On the other hand, if I only paid attention to what I see on the news, and ignored everything else, I’d believe just the opposite; so I’ve come to the conclusion that reality is somewhere in between. If so, then it would be best for each of us, to add a little benevolence whenever we can.

nrhatch - February 6, 2014

As I read your comment, the thought occurred to me that you’d shared that exact thought before:


Here’s my response (from 2 years ago) which still seems relevant:

The nightly news brings every disaster into our living rooms. If we are not mindful, we get buried in the rubble.

The antidote . . . notice the beauty in our own backyards.

6. William D'Andrea - February 6, 2014

I’m very impressed that you actually remembered something I wrote such a long time ago; especially when you post one or more articles a day, and receive so many replies.
What a fantastic memory you’ve got!

nrhatch - February 6, 2014

I don’t remember all of the things all of the time . . . but I remember some of the things some of the time. :mrgreen:

jannatwrites - February 6, 2014

Wow, your memory impresses me, too! Geez, I can’t even remember last week, much less a couple years ago.

nrhatch - February 6, 2014

I do have a good memory . . . very helpful in school and while practicing law. I’m also good at “flushing” outdated data so that my mental filing cabinets aren’t so crammed with info that I can’t find anything. 😀

7. suzicate - February 6, 2014

Yes! Our reaction set the course more so in our lives than the original action. There are times the reaction says much more about that person than the action of the other.

nrhatch - February 6, 2014

We were just talking about silly re-actions at lunch.

At the library the other day, a woman came in 10 minutes before the start of a lecture on Sailing from Maine to Sarasota. She started complaining that there would NOT be enough chairs because the lecture was SURE to be crowded. Etc. Etc.

I looked around the room and pointed out that there were still plenty of empty chairs with only 10 minutes before the start of the lecture.

She didn’t appreciate my observation because she wanted me to moan and groan along with her. Something I am NOT inclined to do . . . without good reason. :mrgreen:

8. brendamarroy - February 6, 2014

When we can’t always change the content, we can change the context in which we hold the content. That’s my story and I’m sticking to it. Great post.

nrhatch - February 6, 2014

Yes! Change the context even if the content remains in situ. 😀

9. lindsaycummingswrites - February 6, 2014

I very much agree. So positive. Thank you for posting, we all need these pep talks every now and then 😉

nrhatch - February 6, 2014

I know I do . . . I write these pep talks for me and am delighted with any spillover benefit to others. 😀

lindsaycummingswrites - February 6, 2014

Well, keep them coming!

nrhatch - February 6, 2014

Loved your last post on how Instant Karma works in your life.

10. jannatwrites - February 6, 2014

This is so true. As my kids work to tick each other off, I keep telling them that they’re in control of their own emotions. They can choose whether to come unglued at the needling or shrug it off. I’ve also told them that if they stopped the angry outbursts, the other person would get bored and move on to do something else.

Do you think they listen to me? Um, no.

nrhatch - February 6, 2014

That’s what makes parenthood the toughest JOB in the world ~> minions that know they aren’t going to get fired no matter what. 😉

11. colonialist - February 6, 2014

To fall into a habit is when a nun parks her dress on the floor and trips over her sandals?
The Eeyore positive is to be positive everything is going to go wrong.
Ignore me – these are very good!

nrhatch - February 6, 2014

You crack me up . . . especially after the unintended double entendre in my last post that Janna’s comment hit home to me.

colonialist - February 6, 2014

‘Course, I had to go and study them gems of re-party!

nrhatch - February 6, 2014

Nothing like witty re-party!

12. ericjbaker - February 6, 2014

Side effect of not being miserable all the time: People enjoy your company and you will not run out of friends.

nrhatch - February 6, 2014

To extroverts, being more in demand is a POSITIVE. To introverts, it could go either way. 😛

13. Tom Merriman - February 6, 2014

Always good to receive reminders such as this, Nancy! I do my best, but sometimes forget!

nrhatch - February 6, 2014

Same here. It’s easy to be mindful if we remember to mind our mind . . . and hard when we don’t.

14. diannegray - February 6, 2014

As my mum always says -‘ it’s not what happens to you in life, it’s how you deal with it that really matters’. Having said this – she is an extremely negative person and doesn’t take her own good advice 😉

nrhatch - February 6, 2014

An image of Eeyore dispensing advice on positivity just popped into my mind . . . it made me smile. :mrgreen:

Here’s to doing as she says and not as she does.

15. Three Well Beings - February 7, 2014

You’ve included some really wonderful quotes, Nancy. I love the focus…and the suggestion to change the focus when necessary. 🙂 But my favorite line is…”If you want more joy in your life, start now.” A perfect contemplation!

nrhatch - February 7, 2014

Yes! There is no reason to postpone Joy until our “in box” is emptied out. Just do it NOW.

16. Val Boyko - February 8, 2014

Its so good to be reminded of the power we have over our own thinking and being happy! Thank you.

nrhatch - February 8, 2014

Thanks, Val. When we have a few “tricks” up our sleeves, life becomes smoother sailing.

17. kateshrewsday - February 8, 2014

Lovely piece of advice, Nancy. About the funny bone especially. What would we do without it?

nrhatch - February 8, 2014

Thanks, Kate. My sense of humor keeps me afloat. Without it, I’m sure I’d “sink.”

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