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Don’t. Just Don’t. December 12, 2013

Posted by nrhatch in Blogging, Humor, Poetry.

IMGP1472aMy favorite posts are those that make me laugh, or make me think of positives and possibilities, or teach me something that I want to know.

I enjoy posts on writing tips, and silly bits, and places you been, and things you’ve seen.

And FOOD.  Food is cool, especially with photos that make me drool.

But no snakes, or snails, or puppy dog tails.

Or frog’s legs. Or pig’s ears.  Or tongue.


I don’t enjoy posts that pull apart a perfect pleasant poem or painting and try to imbue it with esoteric symbolism NEVER intended by the original creator.

I saw three pompous twats doing just that on TV a few months back. They analyzed a stunning B&W photo of Marilyn Monroe eating a cheeseburger at a Drive-In . . . to the death!

Their rambling and posturing transformed a FUN photo into a mixed up muddled up mess of pseudo-intellectual sociological BS.

The trio’s ramblings transported me back to High School English.

Tree-Frog-PerchedFrom there, it was just a short stroll down the hall to High School Biology where ill-prepared students transformed frogs into “parts is parts” via dissection.

In case you’re wondering, dissecting frogs in HS Biology is as unnecessary and unhelpful as dissecting poetry ~ to us, to the poems, and to the frogs.

Not that YOU would ever do that . . . but just don’t.

Aah . . . that’s better!

Inspiration for this post/editorial comment:  Help Shape My Content With This Scientifically Validated Poll (Eric J. Baker).

* * * * *

Thanks to a mad twist of Hamlet’s Shakespearean soliloquy, Col selected me to host Haiku Monday this week ~ Enter at Haiku Monday ~ (A Twist of) Fate 


1. suzicate - December 12, 2013

I dislike those shows (radio or tv) where they analyze to death taking the beauty and enjoyment away.

nrhatch - December 12, 2013

Sometimes there are hidden meanings and nuances that “tour guides” can point out to enhance our experience, but much of the time it’s unsubstantiated conjecture and speculation offered up with side order of “pseudo-intellectual B.S.” 😛

2. shreejacob - December 12, 2013

Someone attempted to dissect a Marilyn Monroe picture? Hmm..I remember reading from a book…it said “sometimes a stubbed toe is just a stubbed toe!”..lol

nrhatch - December 12, 2013

Yes! It was the oddest thing watching them take this picture apart, pixel by pixel. People are so full of themselves and their presumed self-importance at times.

It is Marilyn.
Eating a Cheeseburger.

Enough said.

3. Pix Under the Oaks - December 12, 2013

I could not dissect the frog in high school biology. The nuns were not happy. My parents were called.. 😀

nrhatch - December 12, 2013

I refused too! What a pointless and fruitless exercise at that stage of our education.

4. Don - December 12, 2013

Let the mystery and the beauty, or whatever it is, speak for itself.

nrhatch - December 12, 2013

Yes! I think perhaps when people over-analyze a photo, it’s because they’ve forgotten that a picture tells a 1,000 words. 😉

5. William D'Andrea - December 12, 2013

On Thanksgiving Day my brother-in-law dissected a turkey, and nobody had any complaints. That’s one way to learn biology, in a very satisfying way.

nrhatch - December 12, 2013

Glad you enjoyed your Thanksgiving repast, William. We had another turkey-less Thanksgiving. Gobble. Gobble.

6. jannatwrites - December 12, 2013

I remember having to analyze poetry in high school I almost never “saw” what the teachers did. They read more into it than I do…that’s when I knew I’d never have a career in that 🙂

As for photos, my analysis is basically “it’s pretty” or “not my favorite.”

nrhatch - December 12, 2013

Yes! Our H.S. English teacher, Mr. Ranta, a frustrated poet of the first order, attempted to imbue poems with all manner of “fluff and nonsense” ~ we referred to his efforts as “Ranta’s rants.” 😛

7. librarylady - December 12, 2013

I could tell a horror story about dissecting frogs, but will spare you. I totally agree about the post mortems on innocent books and poetry. I can only imagine the belly laughs they would generate if the author could hear all the secret meanings implied in their lovely creations.

nrhatch - December 12, 2013

Thanks, LL! From dissections-gone-wrong to post mortems that miss the mark to belly laughs ~> I’m with you all the way.

8. ericjbaker - December 12, 2013

Tomorrow, I’m writing a 5000-word analysis of the pale blue borders on your blog. I’m sure it means something profound!

nrhatch - December 12, 2013

Yes! Finally someone who can explain me to me! 😉

9. colonialist - December 17, 2013

You really should have used iambic pentameters, and the thrust of the underlying metaphor must be developed before the penultimate stanza, and if you cut the tummy open at this point you will find the digestive tract just behind the … 🙂

nrhatch - December 17, 2013

Bwahaha! The perfect combination Disectomy/ Poem Lobotomy ~ what you would get if you crossed a HS English teacher with a HS Biology teacher. :mrgreen:

10. Linda - December 18, 2013

So glad that I did not take biology! I would have put up a huge protest to dissecting a frog that had been killed just for that reason. Although I did slightly dissect a pet mouse that had died. I felt horrible having done it. It was kind of interesting though. But I had no one to discuss it with. Who can you tell such a thing to? No one. My daughter would flip out.

nrhatch - December 18, 2013

I hear ya! The only thing I’ve ever “dissected” is a turkey carcass . . . just one of the reasons I became a vegetarian.

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