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A Celibate Marriage November 23, 2013

Posted by nrhatch in Humor, Joke, People.

Celibacy can be a choice in life . . . or a condition imposed by circumstances.

At a Couples Retreat, the instructor in a workshop on communication stressed that couples should learn about things that are important to each other.

To illustrate what he meant, he asked the men, “Can you name and describe your partner’s favorite flower?”


Frank leaned over, touched his wife Mildred’s arm and whispered, “Gold Medal-All-Purpose, isn’t it?”

Thus began Frank’s life of celibacy . . .

Aah . . . that’s better!

Source: e-mail from an unknown author (sent by Joe M.)


1. Pix Under the Oaks - November 23, 2013

I wouldn’t mind that answer.. 😀

nrhatch - November 23, 2013

If BFF said that to me in the middle of a Couples Retreat, I would bust a gut laughing, followed by whispering back:

“Did I tell you today that you’re my favorite?” :mrgreen:

2. Don - November 23, 2013

And to think that Frank was giving a very serious and sensitive answer. He doesn’t deserve that! 🙂

nrhatch - November 23, 2013

Exactly! Mildred doesn’t realize that there’s no reason to take life too seriously . . . we’ll never get out of it alive. 😛

3. granny1947 - November 23, 2013


nrhatch - November 23, 2013

Go Frank!

4. shreejacob - November 23, 2013


Lucky we pronounce it different.
Thanks for the laugh!

nrhatch - November 23, 2013

“Flower” and “flour” have different pronunciations in your neck of the woods? I’ve heard potato/potahto and tomato/tomahto in regional dialect, but never a distinction between Flower and Flour.

shreejacob - November 23, 2013

Oo..well we say Flour.. uhmm…I’m not very good at this..hehe…let’s see. In flour the “our” is pronounces as an “ah” as in arbitrary. Flower is with the strong “our”. But I’m from Malaysia…not too sure how the British say it but most of use the way I explained…a “gentle our” or “ah”. It’s distinct from flower though.

nrhatch - November 23, 2013

Thanks! I learned something new today. Yay.

5. colonialist - November 23, 2013

A man to whom floury compliments would have to do with baking.

nrhatch - November 23, 2013

Exactly! And speaking of baking and cooking up some FUN ~ Susanna has announced the rules for her Annual Holiday Contest:


colonialist - November 23, 2013

Ah, I see … ‘Holiday Mishap’. That one needs to be undercooked or burnt!

nrhatch - November 23, 2013

Perfect theme for a Holiday Contest . . . and I’ve got just the story to share. True too!

6. jannatwrites - November 23, 2013

That was funny, not offensive! (I’d be impressed if my husband could recall a brand of flour. Yes, he’s in the kitchen that little :))

nrhatch - November 23, 2013

Exactly! Frank is not the problem here . . . Mildred has NO sense of humor. 😀

7. William D'Andrea - November 23, 2013

Some years ago when we were attending Christmas dinner with my sister, an elderly husband and wife who lived next door, were among the guests. The wife wore a bright red outfit, with a white furry trim, along with a matching hat.
Her husband told her, “You know, you look like Santa Claus in that outfit.”
She was unamused by that statement, and let him know it, very strongly..
This confirms something I learned many years ago. Be very careful what you say about how a woman dresses. Sometimes it’s better to say nothing at all.

nrhatch - November 23, 2013

Ho~Ho~Ho! I guess he should have said she looked like Mrs. Claus. :mrgreen:

8. katecrimmins - November 23, 2013

I’d be stunned if my husband had ANY answer to that question.

nrhatch - November 23, 2013

Yellow daisies are my favorite flower. When BFF bought me that bouquet of yellow daisies, he got brownie points! 😛

9. Kathy - November 23, 2013

So much depends on context. If Mildred is a super biscuit maker and Frank praises her every time a pan comes hot out of the oven, then he deserves a big kiss. However, if Mildred has been baking her heart out and getting no notice, and has been feeling downtrodden in general–well, she obviously knows what’s important to Frank.

nrhatch - November 23, 2013

Good point, Kathy. I’m biased in favor of Frank because of my r’ship with BFF. If BFF was a “cad” or a “heel,” I’d view Frank in a less favorable light. 😛

10. Grannymar - November 23, 2013

Since I never liked cut flowers in the house, my late husband would have been bang on to name the flour I used. He was a regular helper when I had a baking day, I had no need for a dishwasher, he did all of that without being asked. Is it any wonder I miss him? 😉

nrhatch - November 23, 2013

Not at all. He sounds a right gem, Grannymar.

11. sufilight - November 23, 2013

Hahaha! If my Phil had said that I would have chuckled as I feel loved by him. 😀

nrhatch - November 23, 2013

Same here ~ I expect our significant relationships color how we view the relationships of others.

12. viviankirkfield - November 23, 2013

The answer was kind of sweet, in a way…quite innocent and obviously, the gentleman was a true fan of his wife’s baking.:) Which, in itself, is a compliment to her.:) And if she was miffed by his comment, perhaps it was a good thing they were at a couple’s retreat. 🙂 🙂
Thanks for sharing this, Nancy…and for spreading the good cheer about Susanna’s Holiday Writing Contest…great fun and wonderful prizes!
Happy Thanksgiving to you and your family!

nrhatch - November 23, 2013

I like your interpretation of Frank’s comment. And you’re right about Susanna’s Holiday Contest ~ Fun + Prizes!

And thanks! Hope your Thanksgiving is filled to the rim with family, friends, and food! Gobble. Gobble.

13. flyinggma - November 23, 2013

Loved the husband’s comment…He wanted to get it right for her 🙂

nrhatch - November 23, 2013

Hi Jeanne! It’s lovely to see you flying about today ~ sounds like you’ve have a busy and wonderful fall. Yay!

flyinggma - November 23, 2013

Yay indeed!

14. Three Well Beings - November 24, 2013

And sometimes whole wheat! 🙂 Very funny!

nrhatch - November 24, 2013

Bwahaha! You’re cooking with gas this morning, Debra. 😀

15. ericjbaker - November 24, 2013

We men are not remembered for the 99 things we say right, but the one thing we say wrong. C’est la vie!

nrhatch - November 24, 2013

It does seem that way at times, doesn’t it? 😉

I tend to focus on the 99 things that BFF does right every day while ignoring the “minor glitches.”

16. Monday Writing Magic: WordPress Family Blog Award | Picture Books Help Kids Soar - November 25, 2013

[…] at Spirit Lights the Way: Nancy is a super-sharp wit and fantastic person and writer, her blog entertains and informs. She […]

nrhatch - November 25, 2013

What a lovely way to start my day . . . finding this in my in-box.

I love the spirit behind this award. Blogging creates lovely tapestries of interwoven connections, as evidenced by the fact that I am familiar with 5 of the fine folks on your list.

And I adore the bottom photo of 2 of your favorite guys. Perfect!

Happy Thanksgiving!
Gobble. Gobble.

17. brendamarroy - November 25, 2013

Too, too funny.

nrhatch - November 25, 2013

Glad you got a kick out of it!

18. Marylin Warner - November 25, 2013

What a wonderful, funny, poignant and real post!
I’m still smiling, and I know two couples who could have written this!

nrhatch - November 25, 2013

That’s awesome. I could see my brother teasing his wife in exactly this way! :mrgreen:

19. Booksphotographsandartwork - November 26, 2013

I so believe it!

nrhatch - November 26, 2013

I thought you might! 😉

20. Perfecting Motherhood - November 27, 2013

Haha, does that mean he likes her baking? She should be flattered. 😉

nrhatch - November 27, 2013

I agree! I found his response quite amusing and endearing.

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