jump to navigation

I’ve Stopped Taking Out The . . . SPAM October 18, 2013

Posted by nrhatch in Blogging, Humor.
comments closed

Until a few days ago, I checked my SPAM folder once or twice a day, released any real cyber friends trapped in Akismet’s filter, and emptied the remaining detritus into the large cyber waste can in the . . .

Hmm . . . to be truthful, I don’t know where SPAM goes to die.  Let’s just say the cyber sky.  It’s sounds classier than the cyber crapper.

Although I do like this image of a SPAM Treatment Facility:

My S.O.P. changed this week when SLTW became a virtual breeding grounds for all manner of SPAM comment.  Either SPAM comments are having a cyber convention or they’ve started to multiply like mosquitoes.

Two mornings ago, after emptying the filter of 60 pieces of SPAM, I returned 2 hours later to find 30 pieces waiting for me.

I scanned through two pages of platitudes to ensure that no one I knew had landed in the SPAM dungeon.  Noting no familiar faces or avatars, I flushed.

Three hours later, 40 messages loitered in the filter.  Same process.  WHOOSH.
Two hours later, 60 messages languished.  Quick review.  Goodbye to you.
A few hours later,  80 messages stagnating in the filter.  Review.  Flush.

When I returned to find 100 messages clogging up the Akismet filter, I did this:

Well, not really.

I did this:


NOT!  Putting on the gloves to duke it out with invisible parasites is a recipe for frustration.  It’s like engaging gnats in hand to wing combat.

So, instead of doing more, I did less.  Because sometimes less is more.  I started flushing messages without the standard review and “toodle-ooh.”

Instead, I gave them a different send off message:


Despite the change in protocol, unctuous messages continued to surface as fast as I could flush them.

At that point, I stopped flushing the SPAMMER SLAMMER.

Instead of continuing to engage in battle with unseen cyber pests, I turned my attention to more pressing matters, like this:


Let them think they won the war.  What do I care?  They’re stuck in there in close proximity to one another.  I’m out here, enjoying the fresh air.

Aah . . . that’s better!