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A Tip For Flying December 2, 2012

Posted by nrhatch in Humor, Joke, Travel & Leisure.
68 comments

Donald-Duck-DrivingSome people have the “travel bug.”  They are always “itching” to get away. 

Somewhere.  Anywhere.

Not me. I do not have the “travel bug.” Just the opposite, travel bugs me:

* Sitting for hours in planes, trains, or automobiles gives me numb butt. 

* TSA agents are creepy ~ why would anyone want a job which entails  rummaging around people’s toiletries, underwear, and private parts?  

* Travelers spread germs, lice, and other travel bugs.  And that bugs me.

Huey,-Dewey-And-LouieMany people put up with the inconvenience of  getting from HERE to THERE.   Some see greener grass on the other side of the fence.  Others have wander lust.  Still others are lonely and enjoy being  pawed at TSA checkpoints. 

Not me. The grass never seems greener on the “other side of the fence.” I love where we live and feel no need to “get away.”  I am already where I want to be.

But, sometimes, travel is necessary.  If you must fly to get from where you are to where you need to be, here’s a tip that’s worked well for me: 

When you fly the friendly skies, put your good stuff in  your carry-on . . . so TSA agents can rifle through it with grimy grubby ape-like paws while on-lookers look on in awe.

Fill your checked luggage with stuff you no longer need but are too embarrassed to sell on e-Bay.

If your luggage is lost, which happens 62.7% of the time on certain airlines,  accept the lost luggage reimbursement and consider it an even swap.

Mickey-In-HammockOnce you get rid of all the stuff you could never in a million years unload on e-Bay, stay home. 

Like me.

Aah . . . that’s better!