The Happiness Makeover July 19, 2011
Posted by nrhatch in Books & Movies, Gratitude, Happiness, Mindfulness.trackback
In The Happiness Makeover: How to Teach Yourself to be Happy and Enjoy Every Day, M.J. Ryan shares what she has learned about how to find and really feel the joy in life.
Ryan’s own desire to be happier motivated her to explore the wealth of knowledge available in different cultures and fields on the subject of happiness.
Ryan includes a Bibliography which identifies forty of her sources ~ a helpful addition for readers who want to research further on the subject of happiness.
At the outset, she addresses basic concepts to demonstrate that you can be happier, as long as you are willing to train your mind, the way you would train a new puppy, by using positive reinforcement until your new happiness habits become automatic.
In the next section, what’s standing in your way, she addresses potential barriers to happiness: negative self-talk; hanging on to resentment; expecting life to be fair; living in the past, or worrying about the future; being too attached to desires; struggling against the what is; having unreasonable expectations; striving for perfection; wanting to be right, more than you want to be happy; and biochemistry.
From there, she offers numerous tips on activating daily happiness: recognize that you are only responsible for your own happiness; make a list of what you really enjoy; find your tribe; keep frustrations in perspective; practice gratefulness; explore choices; find ways to enjoy your work; revel in simple pleasures; learn to think optimistically; be happy for everyone else’s sake; focus on what is going well; live according to your true priorities; accept the things you cannot change; stretch yourself; get out of your rut; make someone else happy; be true to yourself; and stop trying to fit yourself into someone else’s mold.
When asked, What is the meaning of life?, the Dalai Lama answered, “to be happy and to make others happy.”
If you agree, you owe it to yourself to spend some time exploring as many avenues as you can to increase the happiness in your own life, and in the lives of those around you.
The Happiness Makeover: How to Teach Yourself to be Happy and Enjoy Every Day is an excellent place to start.
No rules. Just write!
Related post: 13 Books That Changed My Life
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Spirit Lights The Way 
It seems to me that the way to happiness is to first choose what you have, rather than what you don’t have.
I agree! Happiness is not always about getting MORE . . . sometimes it’s about wanting LESS. 😀
Sounds like an inspiring read, Nancy 🙂
Wonderful tips and techniques for training our minds . . . the way we would train a young puppy (or a constantly chattering monkey).
The mind is a wonderful servant . . . and a terrible master. 😉
Happiness is being content with your life
Being happy with what you have
Not envying others their riches
And above all knowing that you are never alone
You always have a friend
And you have faith ( whatever it may be)
I can honestly say that I am NOT jealous or envious of anyone. I would not voluntarily step out of my life and into someone else’s . . . leaving all my experiences behind.
Here’s to peace and contentment. 😀
Great post, thank you.
Thanks, Tok. Glad you enjoyed.
Sounds a great book! I’ll check that one out – perhaps as a gift for someone (or two) I know. . . 😉
We have been on the happiness train lately, haven’t we? Nice ride! Reminds me of the great scene from the movie “Parenthood.” (A terrifically cast film) Grandma does a great job in talking about life and happiness and the way life goes. . .Here’s the link:
Thanks for the link. I swapped it out because the audio on the longer clip was so poor.
Life is like a roller coaster . . . and that’s much more fun than being on a perpetual merry-go-round. Grandma is SMART!
I initially picked out this shorter clip – I knew the sound was so low on the other, but I love the way Steve Martin talks about life: ” Life is messy! I hate that about life! It’s so MESSY!”
Glad you switched out – it is a lot easier to hear. . .
Not only is Grandma smart, as the scenes after this one will show, Mary Steenburgen says to Steve: “I happen to like the roller coaster! As far as I’m concerned, your grandmother is BRILLIANT!”
Of course the great reply to that from Steve is, “Oh yeah? If she’s so smart, how come she’s sitting in our neighbor’s car?”
Your recounting of the dialogue made me laugh all over again. Steve Martin has nothing on you. 😀
Sounds like a great book. Wonder if it’s available in kindle.
It is available in Kindle:
http://www.amazon.com/Happiness-Makeover-Teach-Yourself-ebook/dp/B000XUBG14/ref=sr_1_1_title_0_main?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1311114368&sr=1-1
I think I might read this. Sounds like it would be helpful.
It’s a wonderful reminder to remain mindful of our thoughts. Are they:
True
Helpful
Informative
Necessary
Kind
Much of what we think doesn’t need to be thunk. 😉
“make someone else happy” This is very simple but something we should do. The pleasure of giving is better than receiving!
I agree. The best way to cheer ourselves up is to cheer someone else up. 😀
And create a ripple effect. I found a blog (can’t find it again) on Freshly Pressed last week, where a woman has started a project to go out every day and perform a random act of kindness.
It’s lovely when ripples of kindness spread around the globe. 😀
Happiness isn’t about what happens to you in life, it’s about what you make of it
And it’s about not sabotaging the happiness that could be ours right here, right now.
Sounds like a good read with practical ways to focus on happiness.
Another method of mindfully mastering our thoughts . . . to put them to work for us (rather than allowing them to run amok).
Happiness is a choice and while it doesn’t guarantee any concrete change in our condition, it brings about some sense of peace and clarity… I’m all for being happy… life is short. 🙂
Sometimes everything is “right” in our life, but we’re just to busy to embrace it. Clarity is key.
I am going to be purchasing this book! Thanks 🙂
I hope that you find it helpful in maximizing happiness (by defeating any self-defeating habits). 😀
Right now I def need a happiness makeover 🙂
We all need attitude adjustments from time to time. Maybe we should schedule them like we do oil changes. 😉
Here . . . have a smile on me! 😀
It sounds like a good book, Nancy. I might see if I can get it on my kindle. Thanks for the suggestion.
It is on Kindle:
http://www.amazon.com/Happiness-Makeover-Teach-Yourself-ebook/dp/B000XUBG14/ref=sr_1_1_title_0_main?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1311114368&sr=1-1