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Life is NOT a Free-For-All March 21, 2011

Posted by nrhatch in Blogging, Humor, Mindfulness.

I am a firm believer in the theme for SLTW ~ No Rules. Just Write!  

Of course, there is a caveat to that motto . . . if we are to follow Spirit as it lights the way, we must first check our Ego at the door.   We must be response-able and recognize that actions have consequences.  We must have personal accountability.

When our words and actions are aimed at hurting others or advancing our own interests at all costs . . . that’s Ego at work.  Ego has no place here.

Instead of re-acting with our habitual thought patterns of getting angry, plotting revenge, responding in kind, or any other pattern of action that causes us to relinquish our peace of mind, we can choose a more “able” response.

* * * * *

For those who missed the post and those who need a gentle reminder, here are the Rules of the House:

1. All visitors welcome. Make yourself at home.

2. Your baggage is your responsibility, not ours.

3. If you leave your luggage lying around, please don’t expect us to step gingerly over and around it as we tend to our business.

4. This is not a therapist’s office, and we are not your therapists.

5. Our interior decor is the process of conscious choices made over a period of years using our cumulative life experiences.

6. Please don’t expect us to redecorate to suit your likes and dislikes.

7. If you feel uncomfortable with our choice of interior illumination and decor, we’d like to toss out a few options for your consideration:

* Learn to accept what you cannot change
* Choose to change what you can ~ i.e., your own focus
* Use visualization to create your dream space
* Meditate to reclaim your serenity & peace of mind
* Focus on the positives, not the negatives
* View our decor with amused detachment, not anger

One last rule:

If none of the above works . . . please stop looking around at our stuff.

No rules.  Just write! . . . but be Response-Able.

Life, even on the internet, is NOT a Free-For-All.

ADDENDUM:  Hear Ye!  Hear Ye!  The Case of the Public Scolding

Related posts:  A Change Would Do You Good * Be A Tigger . . . Tiggers Bounce * Silence the Mind * Maintaining Perspective * Accept Your Irrelevance * A Warm Hug for a Sad Child


1. granny1947 - March 21, 2011

Wish the blogtroll on Letterdash would read this…really nasty piece of work.

nrhatch - March 21, 2011

Post the link somewhere she’s sure to see it with an intro designed to arouse her curiosity?

Of course, maybe I don’t want you leading her here to my door. 😀

Cindy - March 22, 2011

No, you far better off staying well away from that one 😦

nrhatch - March 22, 2011

Thanks. Maybe one day s/he will embrace the truth ~ we are one spirit inside.

Unity in the Universe.

2. Rosa - March 21, 2011

I like the decor here!!

nrhatch - March 21, 2011

Thank you, Rosa! 🙂

Piglet in Portugal - March 21, 2011

I’ll second that Rosa

nrhatch - March 21, 2011

Thanks, PiP!

3. Piglet in Portugal - March 21, 2011

The decor here makes you stop, look and reflect 🙂

nrhatch - March 21, 2011

Or as one of my favorite paintings says in the caption, Pause and Reflect.

4. oldancestor - March 21, 2011

Send your problem children my way. We have a way of dealing with that here in Jersey.


Eh, fuggetaboutit.

nrhatch - March 21, 2011

Thanks, OA. The problem is solved.

Anyone who isn’t response-able will be put into the “time out” box rather than having “free rein” to say whatever they want.

Talk about POWER! Hope it doesn’t go to my head. 😀

5. nrhatch - March 21, 2011

For an AWESOME follow up . . . please see the ADDENDUM with a link to a Public Scolding!

6. Lisa - March 21, 2011

Thanks for making such a safe and comfortable home with excellent decor!

nrhatch - March 21, 2011

Thanks, Lisa.

SLTW is a bit eclectic and shabby-chic, but it suits me. 😉

7. Tilly Bud - March 21, 2011

People need boundaries; it’s good to be reminded.

nrhatch - March 21, 2011

The link in the Addendum involved a First Amendment ruling after an enraged citizen gets tossed out of a public meeting for being disruptive.

He got a “time out” in Handcuffs! 😎

Tilly Bud - March 21, 2011

Yes, I read it. A bit dramatic for a stiff-upper lip Brit 🙂

nrhatch - March 21, 2011

Brits are better behaved than Americans, Canadians, and other “rebels” on this side of the pond.

8. barb19 - March 21, 2011

Your decor helps us pause and reflect – I like that.

nrhatch - March 21, 2011

Thanks, Barb. Me too. 🙂

9. souldipper - March 21, 2011

Yeay Nancy…shake it up! I don’t know what caused this post so I can’t tell if you have your stir stick in operation or your whip.

You sure you don’t want to go into WORLD politics? If we promised to cover your back?

nrhatch - March 21, 2011

Thanks, Amy. I’ll pass.

As an attorney I consoled myself with the thought, At least I’m not in politics. 😀

10. jeanne - March 21, 2011

Great post!!! Thanks for looking out for us. You are the best.

nrhatch - March 21, 2011

Thanks, Jeanne! I’m enjoying the interplay on SLTW. Such a FUN way to exchange ideas with people from all around the world.

11. judithhb - March 21, 2011

Loved the post and the Rules of the House. I recently posted a comment on another’s blog and got a very quick, sharp flea in my ear in return. That blog is now off my visiting list.
Keep up the good work.

nrhatch - March 21, 2011

Thanks, Judith. As in most things, balance is key. I want people to feel free to express themselves . . . without stepping on other people’s toes in the process.

Intellectual disagreement is to be expected, but we should aim to disagree without being disagreeable.

Of course, we don’t have 100% control over how others perceive our words. We may write something in a calm soothing tone that is later read in an angry hostile tone by someone who is agitated and annoyed about something else.

It’s a crap shoot. 😀

Cmsmith - March 22, 2011

I agree. This is one of the disadvantages of digital communication–we don’t have access to the non-verbals. Face to face is tough enough with the past-history, social indoctrination and prejudices we all bring to the table.

We just haven’t figured out how to communicate from my brain, heart and soul to yours.

nrhatch - March 22, 2011

Sometimes our intuition works to fill in the blanks . . . but we must be “on line.” 🙂

12. jannatwrites - March 21, 2011

I feel fortunate that I haven’t run into ill-behaved commenters on my blog.

If someone spills wine on the carpet and leaves crumbs on the couch, I think it’s okay to remind them where the door is.

nrhatch - March 22, 2011

Especially if they did it on purpose . . . just to make more work for you. 😀

13. eof737 - March 22, 2011

Hi lady,
You never cease to feed us with great insights and lines to chuckle over and cherish… I’m tempted to ask who has been messing with the decor but it doesn’t matter… let them deal with it. 🙂
BTW, I have given you a Versatile Blogger award. Stop by to collect it! 🙂

nrhatch - March 22, 2011

Thanks, Eliz. You’re right. I’ve hung on to it long enough. Time to let it all go so that I have two hands to embrace the NOW.

I’ll definitely be by for the award. Thanks.

14. gitikapartington - March 22, 2011

I love this and it is timely as someone has been seriously breaking theses rules in my life and definately leaving their HUGE pieces of luggage around. thanks again…may i pass these rules on…might like to add them to a piece in my blog if that ok as they are so lovely
thanks x

nrhatch - March 22, 2011

Thanks, Gitika.

To put them in context, perhaps a link back to the original post would make the most sense:


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