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Teaching Old Birds New Tricks! November 21, 2010

Posted by nrhatch in Animals, Humor, Joke.
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A young man named John received a parrot as a gift.

The parrot had a bad attitude and an even worse vocabulary.

Every word out of the bird’s mouth was rude, obnoxious, and laced with profanity.

John tried to change the bird’s attitude by saying only polite words, playing soft music, and encouraging the bird to “clean up” its vocabulary.

Finally, John had enough and yelled at the parrot. The parrot yelled back.  John shook the parrot.  In response, the parrot got angrier and even ruder.

John, in desperation, grabbed the bird and put him in the freezer. For a few minutes the parrot squawked and kicked and screamed.

Then, nothing.  Total quiet. Not a peep was heard for over a minute.

Fearing that he’d hurt the parrot, John threw open the door to the freezer.

The parrot calmly stepped out onto John’s outstretched arms and said, “I believe I may have offended you with my rude language and actions. I’m sincerely remorseful for my   inappropriate transgressions and I fully intend to do everything I can to correct my rude and unforgivable behavior.”

John was stunned at the transformation in the bird’s attitude.

As John was about to ask the parrot what had caused such a dramatic shift in his attitude, the bird said, “May I ask what the turkey did?”

HAPPY (ALMOST) THANKSGIVING!!! 

Inspiration:  e-mail from unknown author

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Comments»

1. Brown Eyed Mystic - November 21, 2010

Haha–Good one nrhatch!

-BrownEyed

nrhatch - November 21, 2010

This is my favorite “Thanksgiving” joke.

2. Paula Tohline Calhoun - November 21, 2010

I won’t rub it in, but we have a 48-year-old Parrot named Pepper. He has lived with my family (now us)since he was 6 months old. So, I gotta tell you – we have heard every parrot joke ever written or told! This one, however, is one of my favorites, so I give it my hearty 😀 !! Happy tofurkey day! Remember to give thanks for all those poor soy plants that gave up their lives so you could eat! (nudge-nudge, wink-wink – a la Monty Python!)

nrhatch - November 21, 2010

That’s so cool! Pepper the Parrot. Does he talk much?

I seldom eat soy based products, except for a bit of soy milk in my coffee. But lots of OTHER plants give up their existence so we can eat.

If you teach Pepper to say nudge~nudge~wink~wink, please video Pepper and share with us on your blog! 😉

Paula Tohline Calhoun - November 21, 2010

Pepper used to talk all the time, and was very understandable! Sometime I will have to do a post on Pepper, because he is fodder for a lot of tales! He is now quite crabby, and only speaks when he feels like it! But I will say that the one thing he does almost constantly – especially if I am on the phone or talking to someone in another room, he LAUGHS! And LAUGHS, and LAUGHS! He gets on laughing jags that can last for over an hour sometime – and he sounds exactly like ME! Since parrots say and repeat what they have heard the most, it must prove that a LOT of laughing goes on in our house!

I will post about Pepper one of these days soon, and relate some of his saga! Thanks for the prompt!

nrhatch - November 21, 2010

Whenever I leave a job, co-workers say it is my laugh they will miss!

Laughter is awesome exercise for the soul.

Video Pepper emulating your laugh and post it on your blog! Please?!

3. milkfever - November 21, 2010

Love it. Very funny. 🙂

nrhatch - November 21, 2010

I find this joke a~MOO~sing. Thanks for swinging by, Milkfever!

4. Booksphotographsandartwork - November 21, 2010

lol! I am really snickering here. That was so funny although I did have to read the last part twice. Poor parrot. I can just imagine Pepper laughing. Thats great. I’ll be that would great amuse my dog and cat. It would be quite funny to see and I would laugh. The older I get the more my language becomes like a sailor. I wasn’t raised around that but it just feels good sometimes. Ok well a lot.

nrhatch - November 22, 2010

So glad that the joke tickled your funny bone chakra.

I’m anxious to see Pepper laughing if Paula can capture the bird’s mirth on film. 🙂

5. Cindy - November 22, 2010

bwahahahahahahahaha *splurts coffee all over screen*

nrhatch - November 22, 2010

If we could talk to the animals . . . just imagine it . . . chatting with a chimping chimpanzee.

Glad this bit of humor added a bright note to your day.

6. Greg Camp - November 22, 2010

Yup, I’m glad that I didn’t have anything in my mouth when I read that. I wonder about giving “educated” parrots as gifts–teach one something that the recipient needs to hear every day.

nrhatch - November 22, 2010

That is such a wonderful idea ~ having a parrot parrot back the wisdom you’ve shared so that it is always front and center in your thoughts.

Ohm . . .

7. Tilly Bud - April 5, 2011

Hilarious!

nrhatch - April 5, 2011

I thought it tied in nicely with your cow comic today. Moo! 😀


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