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Sometimes It’s Hard To “Come Clean” August 18, 2014

Posted by nrhatch in Humor, Life Lessons, Mindfulness, People.
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49 comments

Have you ever overheard someone recount an event (of which you have first hand knowledge) by shading the truth, more than a little, to place themselves in a better light?

Claiming the role of blameless victim to a vicious attack, rather than recognizing their role as instigator or co-participant?

Maybe it’s the attorney in me, but when someone shares a sob story that sounds one-sided, lopsided, or far-fetched, I do not offer blind support.

I ask a few questions first, to ascertain whether the story is factual or fictional.

Once upon a time, we cautioned our young niece not to provoke our cat or she would get scratched.

Ignoring the warning, she backed Jazz into a corner and reached out to grab him.

He scratched her.

Eyes brimming with tears, she exclaimed, “Jazz scratched me!”

We examined the scratch ~ a glancing blow issued as a “step away from the cat” warning.

“What were you doing when he scratched you?”

“Nothing.”

“You were just sitting there, minding your own business, and Jazz ran up to you and scratched you for no reason?”

“Uh-huh.”

“Really?  You weren’t trying to pick him up?  Or pet him? Or follow him around?  You were just sitting still and he ran over to you?”

Hesitation.

“Well . . . he was under the table, and I just wanted to pet him, and when I got close to him, he scratched me.  But I wasn’t going to hurt him!  I didn’t mean to bother him.  I just wanted to pet him.”

{{Hugs}}

James-the-CatSometimes it’s hard to “come clean” and see our part in the controversy.

Our Egos don’t want to admit the part we played in escalating situations from peaceful co-existence to hissing, scratching, tail-pulling, or worse.

But it’s worth it when we do.

Aah . . . that’s better!

Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony. ~ Mahatma Gandhi

Related posts:  Is Your Soul Yearning For Less Drama (Find Your Middle Ground) * You Can’t Handle The Truth

 

 

Reality: What A Concept! August 17, 2014

Posted by nrhatch in Health & Wellness, Life Lessons, Mindfulness, People.
Tags: , , , , ,
44 comments

alice26thMany of the on-line tributes to Robin Williams had something in common.

Instead of looking at life through Robin’s eyes to garner the whys of his demise, bloggers mentioned him, in passing, as a stepping stone to get other issues into the spotlight.

That’s understandable.

It is easier to know man in general than to know one man in particular. ~ Duc de la Rochefoucauld

* Some called for more resources for those who struggle with mental illness.

A laudable goal, for sure, but I suspect that Robin had adequate (if not ample) resources available to him.

* Others called for us to be kinder in our daily doings and dealings.

An excellent suggestion, but I doubt that Robin took his own life because of   bullies on the cyber-playground or people looking at him askance.

* Some cited the need for open discussion about depression and addiction.

A noteworthy objective, which I suspect is irrelevant to Robin’s death since he spoke in public forums about these “taboo topics” with great regularity.

* Others encouraged us to lend an ear and really listen to those around us.

Yes!  We should do that.  And, yet, I’m not convinced that our poor listening skills, even collectively, caused Robin to end his life.

Sometimes talking makes “it” better.  Other times, talking just makes it BIGGER.

220px-Alice_par_John_Tenniel_27I could keep dunking the teabag, but you get the idea.

Instead of focusing on the reality of Robin’s life, many tributes gave Robin little more than a passing glance before veering off in other directions.

Not surprising, really ~ our view of reality is skewed because we’re looking at life through a dirty lens and cloudy filter.

When something happens, our experiences, concerns, and viewpoints form an opaque overlay, obscuring reality.  We tell ourselves stories and fanciful fictions in a futile effort to create order from chaos and sense from nonsense.

We see the world behind our eyes.

That’s not to say that our creation of ostensible tributes to Robin Williams was misplaced energy.  I don’t have a suitable vantage point to understand or oversee all the various ripples set in motion by our actions and inaction.

Perhaps the outpouring of emotion following his death will cause a tidal wave of love and compassion, lifting us high above the surreal landscape.  From that heightened perspective, maybe we’ll catch a glimpse of reality as IT IS instead of as WE ARE.

A quiet mind, like the surface of a still pond, provides a more accurate reflection.

Reality: What a concept!

Aah . . . that’s better!

On the outside chance that Robin is reading this in Never Never Land, let me close with his view of reality:

Reality is just a crutch for people who can’t cope with drugs. ~ Robin Williams

Related post:  Why We Mourn the Death of Celebrities (Smart Living 365)

Oh, The Changes We’ve Seen August 10, 2014

Posted by nrhatch in Humor, Life Balance, People.
Tags: , , , ,
44 comments

170px-Alice_par_John_Tenniel_02Many of us alive today were born before:

Television * Penicillin * Polio shots * Frozen foods * Xerox * Contact lenses * Frisbees * The Pill (or Viagra!) * Credit cards * Laser beams * Ball-point pens * Cell phones * Pantyhose * Air conditioners * Computers * Computer Dating * Dishwashers * Clothes dryers * Satellites * Astronauts * Space shuttles * Space stations * Dual Careers * Gay-rights * Civil Rights * Daycare centers * Shopping Malls * Wal*Mart * Amazon * Dot.coms * the Internet * Smart Phones * iPods * Fast Food * Time Shares * FM radios * Tape decks * CD’s * DVD’s * Electric typewriters * Pizza Hut * McDonald’s * Instant coffee * Tang

220px--Lena_Horne_conserves_fuel_(gas).-,_ca._1941_-_ca._1945_-_NARA_-_535820

Dang!  That’s a bucket load of change in a short time span.  No wonder so many of us are disoriented, dizzy, and distracted.

I think I need to sit down and rest a spell.

250px-Astronaut-EVA

Aah . . . that’s better!

Related posts:  My New Kindle HDX is Here! (Kate Crimmons) * Welcome to the Future (Raptitude)

“I Vant To Suck Your Blood” August 7, 2014

Posted by nrhatch in Health & Wellness, Humor, Nature, People.
Tags: , , , ,
51 comments

You’re not imagining it.

Those blood-sucking-good-for-nothing-tiny-vampires that should never have been allowed on the Ark really DO love YOU best!

Mosquito (in Public Domain)

Here’s why:

1. Blood Type ~ “Mmm . . . Type O.  My fave!”

2. Body Temp and Sweat ~ “Fee Fie Fo Fum, I smell the blood of a yum yum.”

3. Body Size ~ larger people expel more CO2, an aphrodisiac for skeeters.

4. Beer ~ skeeters are booze hounds.  If you drink it, they will find you.

5. Other factors ~ pregnancy, skin bacteria, clothing color, and genetics.

Or you might just lack the natural repellent that allows “even a Type O, exercising, pregnant woman in a black shirt to ward off mosquitoes.”

Aah . . . that’s better!

For more information:  Why Mosquitoes Bite Some People More Than Others  (Smithsonian)

 

Give Kids The World August 1, 2014

Posted by nrhatch in Books & Movies, Gratitude, Happiness, People.
Tags: , , ,
18 comments

Give Kids The World Village is a 70-acre non-profit “storybook” resort and vacation village in Kissimmee Florida where children with life threatening illnesses and their families can enjoy a week’s vacation ~ all expenses paid:

The village is the passionate vision of Henri Landwirth, a holocaust survivor turned hotelier in Cocoa Beach, Florida.

A man never stands so tall as when he stoops to help a child.                   ~Father Flanagan

To learn more about Give Kids The World ~> visit www.gktw.com.

To learn more about Landwirth’s remarkable life ~> read Gift of Life.

Henri’s autobiography, with a Forward by Walter Cronkite and an Afterward by Astronaut and Senator John Glenn, was co-authored in 1996 by BFF’s cousin, J.P. Hendricks (“John”).

Revenues from the sale of Gift of Life go to Give Kids The World Foundation to help ensure that children and families who need help will always be served.

To find your way in this world, listen to your heart. ~ P.J.  Hendricks (1972) (“Pat”)

Aah . . . that’s better! 

Embracing Opportunities July 30, 2014

Posted by nrhatch in Gratitude, Happiness, Mindfulness, People.
Tags: , , , ,
41 comments

170px-201008241206184375_MI came across this quote the other day:

I don’t believe that we have an *obligation* to help every single person we encounter.

I do believe that there is an *opportunity* to help every single person we encounter. 

Every.  Single.  Person.

~ Paul ((( The Ripples Guy )))

Kindness echoes.  Compassion fills our bucket, drop by drop.

* Do not overlook any good actions, thinking they are of no benefit; even tiny drops of water in the end will fill a huge vessel.  ~ The Buddha

Aah . . . that’s better!

Related Posts:  Making Positive Waves ~ The Ripple Effect (T4D) * Kindness Is My Religion (Streams of Consciousness)

Why Are You So Annoyed? July 29, 2014

Posted by nrhatch in Happiness, Life Balance, Mindfulness, People.
Tags: , , ,
54 comments

Donald-DuckaSometimes we get annoyed at others because they are exhibiting a trait we have not fully integrated and accepted as part of ourselves.

Sometimes.  But not always.

Other times our annoyance is for other reasons entirely:

* I get annoyed (to use a gentle word) with animal abuse, child abuse, and elderly abuse because those actions are morally wrong, not because I share the abuse trait with abusers.

* I get annoyed at bullies and line cutters and liars and cheats and polluters and litterers because I am acting as “unpaid advocate” for the “little guy” whose rights they are trampling.

* I get annoyed when people are late, time and time again, not because I share that trait, but because they are being selfish.  In essence, they are saying that their time is more important than mine.

A flicker of annoyance, standing alone, does not always mean that the object of our annoyance is acting as a mirror for something we need to work on.

Snoopy2As Don noted in The Clowns Around Us, there are those who hijack what could have been genuine heartfelt productive discussions by deflecting, rather than reflecting.

Instead of staying on point, they derail the intended conversation with a joke or off-color remark.

Saying, in essence, “Look at ME!”

I see any number of people who don’t share that trait getting annoyed when someone presses the *disconnect* button on an interesting exchange.

As noted in the comment thread on Don’s post (well worth a read), many of us are starved for genuine conversation and connection in our daily lives.

We long for opportunities to discuss matters of genuine import, to engage in the civilized exchange of ideas, and to offer compassion to those in pain.

So we may feel a flicker of annoyance when someone derails the exchange.

StreetlightA flicker of annoyance (like other emotions) is a signal designed to get our attention so we can choose how to respond to the situation at hand.

Once noted, we must decide whether to take affirmative action or “let it go” and get on with the day.

The third option (stewing in our own juices while doing nothing to change the situation) is almost always a non-productive use of time.

Aah . . . that’s better! 

 

Who’s Pulling Our Strings? July 24, 2014

Posted by nrhatch in Mindfulness, People, Spirit & Ego.
Tags: , , , ,
38 comments

2014-05-05 11-54-38_0042

What’s behind the urgent urgings?

* Hurry up.  You’ll be old, fat, and out of touch soon.

* Do now.  Do Do Do.

* Step outside your comfort zone.

* You’re expanding or contracting.

* Don’t die with your music still inside you.

Why not?

If Mozart had never been, would the world collapse in on itself?

What does it tell us about ourselves if we clothe the naked Emperor in our musings?

If I don’t share my words with the world, will they die un-uttered?

Or will the Universe find some other puppet to speak them out?

Aah . . . that’s better!

We are encouraged to believe we are, each of us, unique.  One-of-a-kind.  To what end?  To contribute to the greater good of all?

Or, perhaps, to feed our Egos.  To feel important.  To believe that we all have a grand purpose.

But do we?

 

The Ugly Guy’s Guide to Dating Hot Chicks July 14, 2014

Posted by nrhatch in Humor, Joke, People.
Tags: , , , ,
25 comments

Years ago while collaborating to write 101 Things Every Man Should Know How to Do, I sketched out “The Ugly Guy’s Guide to Dating Hot Chicks.”

Since it didn’t make the cut (i.e., it landed on the cutting room floor), it’s been sitting around in draft form ever since.

I picked it out of the draft folder the other day, brushed it off, and knew with certainty that I would never, ever, not in a million years, want to revise the Ugly Guy’s Guide into anything more than it is.

But it seems selfish to keep it under lock and key when there are guys out there wanting to emulate Billy Bob and Lyle by landing a hot chick.

Here are the top 7 Tips for Dating Hot Chicks:

(1) Be very, very rich.  Or famous.  Or both.  Having buckets of cash at your disposal is often enough, standing alone, to land a hot chick.

(2) Self-confidence is attractive.  Before you head out the door each day, remind yourself that “you’re good enough, you’re smart enough, and doggoneit people like you.”

(3)  Don’t lose hope.  You are not alone.  There are lots of ugly guys out there who date and even marry hot chicks like Angelina Jolie and Julia Roberts.  You can be one of them.  All you need is hope, perseverance, this guide, and gobs of cash (see tip #1).

(4) Don’t read advice like this in front of girls you want to impress.  If a hot chick sees you reading this, toss it aside and say in disgust,  “What the hell!  I don’t need to read this shit!”

(5) Frequent dark bars.  Bring wads of cash.  Buy drinks for hot chicks until their eyes cannot focus, then make your best moves.

Grumpy gus(6) If you strike out in bars, switch gears.  Go to an AA meeting.  Introduce yourself and explain that you drink because you are ugly.  Wait for the supportive “You’re not ugly” from anyone.  Augment your “Yes, I am” with a deep sigh.  As women join the chorus of “you are not ugly,” pick the best looking one and ask her for coffee after the meeting.

Still nothing?

(7) Don’t be shallow.  Beauty is only skin deep and fades with age.  Focus on inner qualities.  Remember you can always drink your ugly date pretty.

Aah . . . that’s better!

People Watching: Food Courts July 13, 2014

Posted by nrhatch in Humor, Joke, Mindfulness, People.
Tags: , , , ,
26 comments

I took my dad to the mall the other day to buy some new shoes; he is 82. We decided to grab a bite at the food court.

As we ate, he honed in on a teenager sitting at the table next to us. The teenager had spiked hair in a wide variety of colors: green, red, orange, and blue.

My dad kept staring at him, without saying anything.

Annoyed, the teenager sarcastically asked, “What’s the matter, old man, never done anything wild in your life?”

Knowing my Dad, I quickly swallowed my food.

Dear old dad returned the volley with ease, “Got drunk and had sex with a peacock once . . . I was just wondering if you were my kid.”

Aah . . . that’s better!

Source:  e-mail from an unknown author.

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