Three Perspectives on Endings May 23, 2013
Posted by nrhatch in Happiness, Humor, Life Lessons, Poetry.Tags: Dr. Seuss, Humor, Poetry, Shel Silverstein, The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel
29 comments
How we see life depends on which end of the telescope we gaze through:
There are no happy endings.
Endings are the saddest part,
So just give me a happy middle
And a very happy start.
~ Shel Silverstein, Every Thing on It
Don’t cry because it’s over, smile because it happened.
~ Dr. Seuss (perhaps)
All will be well in the end.
If all is not well, it is not yet the end.
~ The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel
Aah . . . that’s better!
Which quote suits you best? Does it depend upon your proximity to “The End”?
The Art of “Cooking” Raw Food May 22, 2013
Posted by nrhatch in Food & Drink, Health & Wellness, Humor.Tags: Cooking, Food, Health & Wellness, Humor, Raw Food, raw food diet
36 comments
To counter health issues, my sister is on a Gluten Free Vegan diet with lots of Raw Food tossed into the hopper.
I equate Raw Food with crisp crunchy salads . . .
And fresh fragrant fruit requiring little or no preparation . . .
Or a plate of crisp crunchy crudités . . .
Or better still, a pairing of fresh veggies and fresh fruit . . .
But what do I know?
A few weeks ago, my sister went to a Raw Food Sampling Event in Mount Dora, Florida. Attendees received samples to try and recipes to take home but did not observe any actual food preparation because . . . preparing Raw Food would have taken too long.
I find that amusing.
As it turns out, many Raw Food Recipes take hours longer to prepare than their cooked equivalents. A few examples:
* White Basmati Rice takes 25 minutes to prepare in boiling water. On a Raw Food diet, rice must be soaked overnight to become digestible.
* White Chocolate Macadamia Nut Cookies take 8-10 minutes to bake, all the while perfuming the kitchen with delicious aromas that make it hard to eat just one. In contrast, raw cookies must be dehydrated for hours before becoming (barely) edible. And, even after all that time, they are still hard.
No, not hard to resist. Just hard.
When I asked my sister about the sampling event, she said, “Interesting talk and good food, especially the crunchy raw live crackers.”
“Did you enjoy any of the samples enough to recreate the recipes at home?”
“No. Probably not. Too much work.”
“Don’t you find it ironic that RAW food takes longer to prepare than COOKED food?”
“I suppose.”
“At least they didn’t call it a Raw Food “Cooking” Demo. That would have been oxymoronic.”
Aah . . . that’s better!
What are your favorite Raw Food “Recipes”?
Smoothies? Salads? Fresh Fruit? Or something more involved?
Related Articles: The Raw Food Diet, Overcooked (David Katz, M.D.) * Raw Food Diet (WebMD) * Pros & Cons of a Raw Food Diet (Prevention)
Why “O” Rather Than A, E, I, or U? May 20, 2013
Posted by nrhatch in Food & Drink, Fun & Games, Humor, Word Play.Tags: Cheerios, Cheetos, Doritos, Food, Fritos, Humor, Word Play
33 comments
Cheerios packaging sold in the U.K. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)
While munching a bunch of Fritos, I began thinking about Doritos.
From there, my amusing musings continued on to Cheetos and Cheerios. And, of course, SpaghettiOs.
What is it about “O” that has allowed it to corner the market as the preferred ending vowel sound for food?
Why are we all urged to “give those O’s a go”? What does “O” have that A, E, I, and U are lacking?
Oh, sure, Italy got “I” in on the action:
We got your Ziti right here! And your Rigatoni, Spumoni, Macaroni, Cannoli, and Spaghetti.
But those “I’s” all sound like “E’s.”
Rigaton~E, Spumon~E, Ast~E Spumont~E.
So they don’t count.
Capiche?
Italy also got “A” some action with Pizza and Lasagna. But those “A’s” sound half-hearted. Pizz~UH, Lasag~nyUH. They don’t sound like “A” at all. Imagine if The Fonz had walked around saying “Uh!” instead of “Eh!” . . . Ferget About It!
And what about “E”? Rather a silent sort. Like nice white rice, “E” barely makes its presence known. Not like “O” which demands to be heard no matter how you pronounce it . . . Potato, Potahto, Tomato, Tomahto.
So what is it about “O”?
Why Gelato, not Gelata, Gelati, or Gelatu?
Why Jell-O?
Is it O’s shape . . . a huge gaping hungry open mouth shouting for MORE?
MORE! MORE! MORE!
Perhaps “O” implicitly gives snackers permission to abandon the mantra “less is more” (at least until “the remains of the bag” contain only crumbs too small for a mouse).
Does O’s uncanny resemblance to donuts, pies, cakes, and cookies cause marketeers (and Mouseketeers) to march to the beat of O’s round sound?
But it’s not just in the food arena where “O” makes its presence known.
Oh, no. ”O” has a book named after it ~ The Story of O.
And there have been two magazines titled “O.”
Ignoring A, E, I, and U (each waiting in the wings, ready to step into a Starring Role), Oprah went to court to fight for the right to use “O,” winning her trademark dispute in an epic Goliath vs. David battle.
Can any other vowel make these kind of claims?
NO! N~O!
Although, to be fair, “I” has quite a following among narcissists ~ the “I, Me, Mine” crowd.
But even narcissists abandon “I” and cry out to “O” during impassioned moments . . . O! O! O!
So, what is it about “O”?
I don’t know.
Maybe it just has a nice “ring” to it.
What say U?
Oh . . . that’s better!
It’s Tigger Time! May 19, 2013
Posted by nrhatch in Amazing Animals, Animal Welfare, Humor.Tags: Animals, Cats, Diabetes in cats, Health, Humor, Pets, Tigger
44 comments
I checked the archives and realized it’s been five months since my last update on Tigger ~ Eat, Drink, and Be Hairy!
Well, our little guy is still with us ~ a full year after his diabetes diagnosis. Yay!
Since January, we’ve been able to maintain his weight and energy level with frequent feedings.
We like big butts and we cannot lie . . .
Tigger also needs constant “watering,” letting us know he’s thirsty by crying in the middle of the kitchen (right next to his FULL water bowl) or by hanging around the (KEEP IT CLOSED!!!) toilet bowl.
My precious . . . my precious . . .
When he’s not eating, drinking, or sleeping, he helps us around the house.
Let me help you organize those photos . . . I’m an exceptional bookmark.
Oh, catching up on correspondence? I’m a stellar paperweight. See?
After his thrice-daily nap, he enjoys seeking out secret Hide-y Holes.
Or playing Tigger-in-the-Box.
Hey, let’s play “Put your hand across the threshold of my hideaway.” C’mon. I double dog dare ya! Wait! Where ya going? Don’t be such a scare-dy cat!
In addition to his other fine feline attributes, Tigger excels at guarding treats against would-be intruders.
Mine! Mine! Mine!
When it’s not too hot or too cold or too rainy or too sunny, Tigger likes to hang out on the deck, but he refused to pose . . . he was too busy hunting lizards!
When I told Tigger that he would be the featured post today, he lifted one eye in my direction, “Fine. But I don’t give interviews. Or sign paw-tographs.”
He’s quite the fuzzy furry feline fella!
Aah . . . that’s better!
3 Dudes Walk Into A Bar May 13, 2013
Posted by nrhatch in Fun & Games, Humor, Joke, Word Play.Tags: Bartender, Bet, Food & Drink, Humor, Joke, WP Prompt
43 comments
Three dudes walk into a bar.Two of them grab a table while the third weaves over to the bar to order a round of drinks.
Bartender shakes his head, “Can’t serve ya. Yer already drunk.”
“Sez who?! I’m nots drunk and I can prove it.”
“How?”
“Set up a bottle at the far end of the bar. I’ll pee into it without mishing a drop. If I win the bet, you give us a round of drinks on the house.”
“Fair enough. But, if you lose, you owe me $100.”
“Deal.”
Wager accepted, the drunk took aim and fired.
As expected, he missed his mark by meters while the bartender laughed at having won the bet.
Unperturbed, the drunk zipped up, gave the bartender $100, then crossed the room to his waiting companions.
“Pay up, fellas! You each owe me $200! I told ya I could pee all over the bar while the bartender stood by and laughed.”
Aah . . . that’s better!
Two Things May 8, 2013
Posted by nrhatch in Blogs & Blogging, Bulletin Board, Humor, Special Events.Tags: Barefeet, Food, Food bank, Food Drive, Humor, Stamp Out Hunger
38 comments
1. It’s National Barefoot Day (a/k/a National “No Socks” Day) . . . a day to kick back, relax, and give your feet a breather!
2. In many areas of the US, postal carriers will be collecting food for local food banks on Saturday.
NOTE: Thousands of local post offices will be participating in the program this Saturday, but not all. To find out whether your letter carrier is participating, contact your local post office.
For more information: Stamp Out Hunger
Aah . . . that’s better!
What You Lose on the Roundabout May 7, 2013
Posted by nrhatch in Humor, Life Balance, Life Lessons, Word Play.Tags: Life Balance, Life Lessons, Roundabout, Weekend Theme, Word Play
41 comments
When I first saw Sidey’s weekend theme ~ Swings and Roundabout ~ I didn’t know what she was on about.
So I decided to sit this one out.
Reading Col’s post, A Really Awful Spin on a Pendulum, gave me a glimmer of an inkling.
He shared an expression that no one had ever expressed or uttered before in my presence:
“What you lose on the swings you gain on the roundabout.”
As it turns out, the expression, and its vice versa, is British/Australian.
Here, in the USA, we tend to say, “you win some, you lose some.”
However you express the thought, it’s all about maintaining balance (and our sense of humor) in the face of life’s inevitable twists and turns.
A swing roundabout Google led me to an intriguing book, What You Lose on the Roundabout, written by a 57-year-old Brit misdiagnosed with Parkinson’s Disease who did just that ~ maintained her sense of humor (and got a tattoo!).
Did ya hear that Rosie? . . . she got a tattoo! 
Aah . . . that’s better!
You Can’t Stop Reading This Book May 6, 2013
Posted by nrhatch in Books & Movies, Bulletin Board, Humor.Tags: Books, Can't Sleep Without Sheep, Contests, E-Books, Sheep
31 comments
As I mentioned last week, Susanna’s holding a contest to coincide with the e-launch of Can’t Sleep Without Sheep . . . tomorrow!
What d’ya bet Susanna’s too excited to sleep tonight?
For the contest, she asked us to write an advertising jingle designed to make readers tingle with anticipation.
The winners get prizes!
Cool prizes!
If you’re too tired to write a jingle because you suffer from insomnia, or feel there is too much jingling in the world, you can win prizes for tweeting about the book this week. Details HERE!
There’s also a coloring contest for kids.
Yes! There’s still time to get in on the FUN.
Here’s my jingle, sung to the tune of Swagger Jagger:
illustration copyright Mike Wohnoutka 2010
You can’t stop reading this book
Reading this book
Reading this book
You can’t stop reading this book
So get a copy now
You can’t stop counting those sheep
Counting those sheep
Counting those sheep
You can’t stop counting those sheep
So get a copy now
Can’t sleep without sheep
Can’t. Can’t.
Can’t sleep without sheep
Not familiar with the tune?
Here . . . have a listen:
(B)Aah . . . that’s better!
NASA’s “Out Of This World” Poetry Contest May 3, 2013
Posted by nrhatch in Bulletin Board, Fun & Games, Humor, Poetry, Word Play.Tags: Contest, DVD, Earth, Haiku, Humor, Mars, MAVEN, NASA, Poetry
16 comments
Milka (Perfecting Motherhood) shared a link to an “Out of this World” poetry contest with me yesterday:
Send Your Haiku To Mars! NASA Seeks Poets
This stellar contest is open to everyone on Planet Earth. All submitted haiku must be in English, with three lines following the 5-7-5 syllable format.
An example from newscast anchor Dave Mattingly:
Mars, you planet red
No life, just craters and ice
Dark, dark, dark, dark, goose
He’s got my vote!
Three winning poets will be invited to send their haiku into outer space with NASA in November.
Everyone who enters will have their name included on the DVD.
The submission deadline is July 1. Starting July 15, the public will vote to select three winning poems to travel on the spacecraft’s DVD. Winners will be announced Aug. 8.
The poems will be accompanied on the MAVEN by student artwork, selected by popular vote in a separate contest.
What a great way to rocket to stardom, to launch your poetry career, to take your writing to the next level, and to boldly go where no haiku has gone before!
I can see your resume now . . . “partnered with NASA on the MAVEN mission.”
Illustrations: Wikipedia ~ MARS
For more details: Send Your Name and Message to MARS! and Contest Rules.
Aah . . . that’s better!
Can’t Sleep Without Sheep May 1, 2013
Posted by nrhatch in Books & Movies, Bulletin Board, Humor.Tags: Books, Can't Sleep Without Sheep, Contest, Sheep, Sleep
10 comments
Susanna’s announced another contest!
With fabulous gifts and exciting prizes!
The contest coincides with the e-launch of Can’t Sleep Without Sheep on May 7th.
At the moment, she’s asking contestants to write an advertising jingle that will make readers tingle with anticipation.
And there’s a coloring contest for kids.
You can find all the details HERE:
Let’s Talk Sheep – BAAH! A CAAHNTEST!!!
So, d’ya feel like playing “advertising copywriter” by writing a jingle? If you like the idea, please let Susanna know by casting your VOTE.
(B)Aah . . . that’s better!
